She Remembers
by karazorel
Summary: What happens after Josh operates on Kate? Does she remember Rick telling her something special after she was shot? What's next for Beckett and Castle?
1. Chapter 1

**DISCLAIMER:** The characters contained herein remain the property of ABC Productions. The story contained is meant only for personal enjoyment and no money is being made from the story. No infringement is intended. I offer this fan fiction as a tribute to the creative teams involved in the actual production of the show However, I reserve the right to any original characters I create for the purpose of fan fiction story telling.

Chapter 1: Acceptance & Goodbyes

"Doctor, maybe you should sit this one out." the assistant surgeon suggested as Josh, hand trembled while holding the scalpel over the bullet hole that put Kate in his operating room. He hated that she kept so many secrets from him and that she seemed to be rapidly distancing herself from him over the past week. She seemed to have put herself into a bubble and she was not letting anybody else in. Anybody else except Castle that is. Josh already knew that there was a part of Kate that she would never let him into. But she did not have any problems letting Castle in.

Richard Castle, the unofficial third person in their relationship. The man he kept trying to beat in Kate's eye and heart but he never could. He was all he heard about from her. So it came as no surprise to him when the ambulance arrived and Castle was right there, holding his girlfriends hand tightly.

It was a tricky operation. The bullet lodged itself mere inches away from her heart. Which is why he was called in to operate. Nobody at the hospital knew that this woman lying on the operating table was his girlfriend. Kate preferred it that way, and he was going to continue with his sacred oath and save her life.

"I'll be fine. Just make sure she stays alive while I repair the damage." he finally pulled the bullet out and dumped it into the nearby kidney basin.

The operation took a couple of hours. Beckett's family from the 12th precint were all cloistered in the waiting room, anticipating the results of the operation. Castle sat in a corner of the room, hands over his face, manly tears streaming its way down. His mother held him close to her, trying to appease him.

"Richard, there was nothing you could have done. You can't watch her every second of the day. Don't be so hard on yourself. Kate would not want to see you this way." she tried to convince him.

"Dad, she's gonna be fine. I just know it. Beckett isn't going to go down just like that. She is a fighter." Alexis leaned her head on her father's shoulder, trying to convince herself of her own words.

The sight of Josh entering the room hushed the rest of the people who were there. Kate's dad, Ryan, Lanie, and Esposito straightened up from the couch where they sat across from the others, very tired and sad at the turn of events. Nobody expected Beckett to take a hit. It was all supposed to be over.

Josh headed straight for Castle and tapped him on the shoulder. Castle looked up at him, his eyes begging for some positive news. "She's in recovery right now. She'll be in ICU for a few days to avoid infections, but she will be fine. We got it all out."

Castle felt the heaviest load he had ever carried on his shoulders lighten. Beckett was going to be fine. He smiled at Josh and took his hand in for a firm handshake. "Thank you! Thank you Josh!" Castle turned to the others "She's fine!"

Everyone seemed to want to see Beckett all at once. Josh explained why he would have to limit her visitors to only immediate family for the time being.

"So I can't see her?" Castle felt a sharp pain run through him. He could not stand the idea of not being able to see Kate until she got better.

Josh gave Castle a look that kind of said "You have got to be kidding right?" and it took everything that Castle had in him not to slug the conceited smirk off his face.

**3 Days Later**

Her sedatives were finally being lessened enough to the point where she was beginning to drift in and out of consciousness. The scenes running through her mind were all hazy. There as no way she could seperate fact from fiction. One minute she was giving a speech, the next she was curled over. Castle, running, holding her... "Kate, I love you..." Was that last part a dream?

Josh was sitting in the ICU, waiting for her to wake up. He wanted to be the first person she saw the minute her eyes opened. He refused to join Doctors Without Borders on their next mission because he was serious about being the person who was going to nurse her back to health.

He was checking her vital signs when he saw her eyes begin to enter rapid eye movement. she started flinching slightly. Her left hand instinctively went to her wound area. She smiled and seemed to be whispering something.

"Kate? I'm here kate. I love you." Josh whispered in her ear. Hoping she would respond. What he heard next crushed his very being.

"Rick, where are you? Castle? Rick, always... Rick, I love you too." she responded unconsciously.

"Rick... Castle... love...you..." her voice was weak but he heard her clearly. He wasn't the one she needed at that time. He had no place in her life. He had to accept the fact that he had lost the game.

He picked up the intercome and asked the nurse to call for him. If Kate was to get better, he had to make sure that the cure was as close to her as possible.

"'I'm Richard Castle." he introduced himself at the nurse's station at the ICU. He was instructed to wait while they got the attending to come for him.

Instead of taking him directly to Kate's room, Josh took Castle to the cafeteria. He was going to be the bigger man. He was going to concede.

"She keeps asking for you Castle." he began. "It's not me that she needs right now. I'm putting your name on her allowed visitors list."

"Are you sure...?" Castle wasn't at all sure where Josh was leading in all this.

"I'm quite sure that you are who she needs right now." he refused to go into details. He was already conceding the woman he loved, he was going to make sure he left with his pride intact at least.

Before Castle could say another word, Josh's beeper went crazy. Running to the ICU both men knew who the emergency case was.

"What the hell happened!" Josh demanded of the nurses who were running around trying to stabilize Kate who was having siezures.

"Her heart rate just shot through the roof. We don't know how it happened." the nurse on duty tried to explain while the attending male nurses tried to hold her steady.

"Kate!" Castle exclaimed as he tried to make his way to her. The burly male nurses threw him back. "Kate! I'm here! I won't leave you!"

"Let him through!" Josh ordered.

The mere sound of Castle's voice had some sort of soothing effect on Kate. Her stats began normalizing as suddenly as they went haywire.

Castle took his place beside Kate and held her hand tightly in his own. He lowered his head to her ear. "Always Kate, always."

Josh wasn't sure but he thought he saw a smile cross her lips. He shook his head, trying to convince himself that he was doing the right thing. He left the room and asked the nurse to get Kate Beckett's chart. He got on the phone while waiting and spoke to his assistant. It did not take long for him to assign Beckett to another doctor.

"Rick?" Josh peeked into the ICU at the end of his shift. Castle made a shushing motion as he uncurled Beckett's fingers from his own and he got up to talk to Josh outside the room.

"I've reassigned Kate's case." he scanned her chart for any final instructions before the turn over.

"What? Why? She said you were the best! Now you are abandoning her? I thought you loved her man!" Castle felt his anger beginning to swell. Some boyfriend this jerk was! Why did Kate always fall for the wrong men who just hurt her in the end? Why Josh when she could be happy with him?

" Will you take it easy Castle! I know! I know I am not the one she loves! That's why you are here you idiot!"

"What?" Castle couldn't believe what he was hearing. He let go of Josh and tried to process what he had just heard.

"She's all yours. When she wakes up in a few days, tell her I did her procedure then left for Haiti. She'll know what I mean." Josh straightened out his uniform. 'She said some things that made it clear where I stand."

"It must have been the drugs..." Castle was fumbling for an explanation, even though he did not know what he was explaining about.

Josh smiled and shook his head. Kate had told him that Castle was clueless at times but this was priceless. "That's the thing about being drugged Rick, it's like being under a truth serum." he began walking away from the one who truly owned Kate Beckett's body, mind and soul.

Castle went back to the room and took his place once again. His rightful place.

"Wake up Kate. I need to hear you say it." he kissed her forehead. She stirred a bit. "Always Kate. Always."

"Rick... Why are you here? Always Rick. Stay... don't go.. need you..." then she was silent once again.

TBC


	2. Taking Responsibility

**Chapter 2: Taking Responsibility**

There was one thing that had troubled Castle from the minute that their group had assembled at the hospital on that fateful day. The fact that Jim Beckett retreated into the background when his daughter needed him the most did not go unnoticed by most. While Castle lay beside Kate's almost lifeless body, her father cowered in fear together with everyone else and then stood there catatonic as she was loaded into the ambulance. Even in the waiting room he seemed to have detached himself from what was going on. He had an expression on his face that told those around him that he had tuned out of his surroundings. It was only later on that Josh had told Castle that he had never met Kate's father which is why he had not approached him in the waiting room.

A week later and Kate was finally transferred to a private suite in the hospital. Something she would not have allowed if she were already fully conscious of what was going on because she knew who would be on the financial end of that benefit. But it was something he wanted to do for her. Kate Beckett deserved the best in life, and he was going to give it to her. She was surrounded by friends from the precinct, her "family" composed of Ryan, Esposito, and Lanie, were at the hospital each night after their shifts. Keeping Castle company and trying to take the concerned, worried look off his face by telling him about the latest crazy murder they were solving. Even Demming came by for a visit. Martha and Alexis both did their time with him by bringing him meals and fresh change of clothes since he had taken a suite next door for himself to sleep in. Through all of these goings on, all of these visitors, the one man who should be standing next to Kate aside from Castle was nowhere to be found. Where was Jim Beckett?

Her sedatives were going to be withdrawn soon. Meaning she would soon regain full consciousness and start asking questions. Questions that Castle was not willing to answer with a lie. It only took 2 cups of free Java Hut Espresso's to get Ryan and Esposito to detect the missing Beckett's whereabouts. Seems he had been spending most of his time at a local bar, downing bottle after bottle while watching whatever brain dead program the bar had on at the time. Jim Beckett usually stayed till closing he was told. During which time the bartender would dutifully call him a cab to take him home.

Castle knew from her stories that this was how he reacted to life altering situations. She had told him about how she had almost him to the bottle after her mother had died. He was "the life I saved." she had once told him. He knew that he could not be allow him to be another "life I lost." for Kate.

"I think you've had enough for tonight Jim." Castle plopped down some cash on the bar counter and signaled the bartender to not serve any more Buds to the man sadly crouched over the counter.

His eyes were red from all the crying he had been doing since his daughter had been shot. He did not know what to do with himself. Jim Beckett knew he was a weak man. Kate had always taken after her mother in that aspect. She was strong willed and knew what to do in any situation. He always shrank from any real responsibility.

"Richard Castle. My daughter's hero. Come, join me in a celebration of life." he held up the half empty bottle in a seeming salute.

"Why are you doing this Jim? Let's get you home." Castle already had a cab waiting for them outside. He had come down to the bar the minute Ryan had called him to let him know he had arrived. He had hoped to catch him before he got drunk. But it seemed apparent that Jim had been drinking long before he got to the bar.

"Home... Yeah. Katie's waiting for me. Her mom is working late again. Somebody has to put her to bed." it was clear that the man was remembering the past. "No wait, Katie's dead. Right?" Inebriation was obviously not his strong suit.

"Kate is fine. She is waiting for you." he helped him get to his feet and led the way to the waiting cab. It took off in the direction of the hospital.

The extra strong black coffee seemed to have its desired effect on Jim. "What are we doing at the hospital? I don't want to be here! Take me home!" he demanded.

"Jim! You haven't been to visit her once since this all happened." Castle began to explain. "She needs you. You are her father."

"No! You don't understand! I can't... I can't!"

"Can't what Jim?" Castle half dragged the man out of the cab and into the elevator.

"I can't be there for her Rick! Not in the way that you can."

"Jim be reasonable. Don't abandon her again. Things have changed now! This isn't the same as Joanna's murder. Your daughter is alive!" He practically hurled the man into Kate's suite.

He picked up the man who had crawled into a corner and turned his face away from the bed in the middle of the room.

"She is your daughter! She is alive! Kate is alive Jim!" Castle controlled the anger in his voice to a level that seemed to sound like an angry whisper. "Look at her! Don't fail her Jim, not this time."

"She could be dead Rick! She could have died! I told you to take care of her! I asked you to make her back off and what happened? This is all your fault! So don't tell me I failed her! I tried to stop her from running in front of the bus, she wouldn't listen!"

"Don't you think I feel guilty Jim? I know I failed her. I know I almost abandoned her because I could not make her see reason. I know that I could have moved faster and taken the bullet for her! I know a lot of things now. But blaming each other isn't going to solve anything! She needs her family around her, and you are at the top of that list." Castle made a fist that he thrust deep into the cushion of her bed, his nails digging into his own skin so hard that he almost bled when he released it.

Jim Beckett looked over his daughter. She wasn't connected to countless tubes like she was when he saw her being wheeled out of the operating room. She looked troubled. Could she actually hear them? Her voice was almost inaudible but because of the sudden silence in the room, they heard her.

"Dad, Rick, don't please..."

That was all it took for the men to back down. Jim bent down close to his daughter's ear. "We'll stop Kate. Don't worry. Castle will take care of you." he looked directly at the man, as if willing him to give his word. He nodded in agreement. "I'll visit you again soon. He won't have to force me to come back."

"Thank you Rick. Just give me time ok?" Jim Beckett left him hopeful that he would eventually be there for his daughter.

**A Few Days Later**

She felt sore all over. Almost as if a truck had hit her in the chest. Her mind was showing her images that hurt her to see. Something made her keel over. Castle tackled her. Castle! Was he alright? Was he okay? Oh God!

"Castle! Are you okay?" her pained voice broke through the slumbering thoughts of the man dozed off on the side of her bed. Her eyes opened suddenly, fear and panic evident.

"Castle! Castle! Rick! Where am I? Where are you?" her eyes were beginning to get accustomed to her surroundings. She smelled heavy disinfectant all around her. Then she knew where she was. What happened to her?

"Kate! You're awake!" Castle hugged her tightly and kissed her forehead. He stroked her hair as her arms stayed at her sides. Not exactly sure what to say or do. He released her long enough to ring the nurse's station.

"What just happened Rick?" it seemed like she was at Montgomery's funeral just a few moments ago.

He sat beside her and lowered her voice while the nurse came in to check her vitals and another went to call her doctor.

"You were shot."

"At the funeral?" she asked. He nodded.

"Then it wasn't a dream?" she looked towards the area where she felt the bullet rip through her chest.

"Josh did the operation..."

"Josh! Where is he?"

"He's in Haiti."

"He left me?" her eyes welled up. She never thought he would be that callous. They were having more serous problems lately because of his jealousy over Castle. He did not want her to keep him on as her shadow. He wanted her to end the relationship that was giving her a reason to live and be happy. Her relationship with Castle was going to always be complicated, and it seems nobody would ever understand how badly she needed him to be around her.

"He said you would understand why." Castle felt a cut in his heart. He knew he should have expected it, but it still hurt to see her reaction.

"I'm so glad you're here Rick." she leaned in to give him a hug.

"Always Kate."

She tightened her hug around the man who served as her sanity and anchor during her most trying times.

**End Of The Week**

She had healed better and faster than her doctors had expected. Something that she owed to her strict physical regimen as a cop and the medical instructions that Josh had left for her new attending to follow. Kate still ached in some places but she was ready to go home. The only problem was, she couldn't go home to an empty house. She still needed bed rest.

"You're coming home with me." Castle stated matter in a manner that made it clear to her that he was not taking no for an answer.

Jim, Lanie, Esposito, Ryan, Martha, and Alexis were all at the hospital to see her off. Lanie had tried to volunteer her own apartment but when Martha pointed out that it was preposterous for Kate to stay on a sofa bed without anybody to care for her when Lanie was at work, it became pretty obvious that Castle was in charge this time.

"You'll be well cared for. The penthouse has 4 rooms, mother and I are almost always home, I can get you a nurse..." he sucked his lips in and stopped talking when Kate threw him one of her "You are going overboard" looks.

"C'mon Kate. Give us guys a chance to hang at Castillo Castle." Esposito chimed in. "It would be fun to hang after work."

"I can sleep over." Lanie volunteered. "We can bond big time with Martha and Alexis."

"And I can cook for everyone." Martha said in that lilting voice of hers.

"Grams, we don't want to have the 12th precinct in the hospital with food poisoning." Alexis and her father laughed.

"Kate, stay with Rick. I would feel safer that way. You know I would take you in but we would not fit in my studio apartment..." her father explained.

"But I have my own apartment! I can do this! I am not a child nor an invalid dad!" Beckett protested.

"Alright. Then I'll move to your place till you get better." Castle knew that would make her see his way. He did not relish the thought of sleeping on her couch long term but if that is what it took for him and the others to know that she would be safe...

It seemed like everybody was ganging up on her by then. Even Ryan was volunteering to make his famous milk with cinnamon for her if she would only stay where she would be safe.

"Okay fine! I'll move in with you for now. But remember, I sleep with a gun." she smiled at him.

TBC


	3. Settling In

**Chapter 3: Settling In**

Castle was moving around the penthouse in hyper-drive mode, trying to get everything ready before got in after lunch. Her dad and Lanie would be dropping her off and staying for a late lunch to help her settle in. Martha and Alexis could not do anything except watch in amazement as he took the Dustbuster to every nook and cranny of the house. Trying to make sure everything would be spotless for his visitor.

"Richard, I have not seen you clean house this way since you divorced your first wife." Martha teased when he finally stopped to take a breather and down a glass of what looked like orange juice to him.

They had gathered around the breakfast bar as was their daily morning custom. But today was a different kind of morning. There was an excitement in the air and they could all feel it. Castle was looking forward to having Kate "come home." In whatever the sense of the word might mean at the time.

"Gurg! What is this?" He pointed to the concoction that was in the pitcher which he took out of the fridge.

"Pomegranate and cherry juice." Martha proudly explained. "It's supposed to be high in anti-oxidants and prevents arthritis."

"If it doesn't burn my intestines with acid first." Castle spit out the rest of the juice and threw the rest of what was in his glass into the sink.

"Make sure Beckett doesn't drink that. We don't need her back in the hospital." Castle instructed Alexis.

The 18-year old smiled at him. She was happy to see her father so excited about having Beckett while she regained her strength. He had not been that happy in a while. The argument he had with Beckett before she was shot had left him very angry and closed off emotionally. He refused to talk about what happened even with his own mother. Now, that image of her father was just a thing of the past.

He had gone into the hall closet and came out with a box of baby monitors which he planned to place in all the rooms in the house.

"Oh Richard!" Martha started laughing heartily at the scene before her.

"Really dad?" Alexis stifled a laugh.

"You think it's too much?"

"Oh no. Beckett will love being treated like a baby." His mother was being pleasantly sarcastic.

"Thank you mother." he said in all seriousness. "I just want her to know that she is safe here and that even if she doesn't see us, she can always call out for help when she needs it."

"I think the house is big enough for us to hear her holler dad." Alexis jumped off the stool and gathered up her things. "I'm off to Serendipity with Ashley. He's picking me up downstairs in a few minutes." She kissed her father on the cheek.

He looked at her with disappointment. "I thought you were going to help me prepare the house."

"You're doing a great job dad, and grams is here if you need help." the frown on his face was not erased by her encouraging words. "I will be home in plenty of time to help Beckett settle in." She smiled at him before heading out the door.

"Isn't it enough that she's moving out to be with him in January? Can't she spend her last few months with us?" Castle addressed his mother who was already unwrapping a baby monitor.

"Richard, you have to accept that Alexis is growing up faster than you are comfortable with. The woman is finally separating from the child. Just be happy with whatever time she chooses to spend with us."

"She said we'd be the father-daughter version of Grey Gardens." he moped.

"Come now Richard. Let's see how we can hide these baby monitors from Beckett." she said in an effort to distract his thoughts. "You know she will poke you to death if she ever finds out you did this."

Jim Beckett knocked on the hospital door before entering. "Katie?"

"Almost ready dad." she responded while Lanie helped her get into her red synthetic leather jacket.

'We weren't expecting you this early Jim." Lanie said as she helped her best friend into a nearby chair. The short activity of getting dressed took the wind out of Beckett, leaving her feeling lightheaded.

"Yes. Well the town car that Castle sent to pick us up was early." he explained while he gathered his daughter's things at the door.

"A town car? First he insists on paying for this room, then he puts me up at his house, now a town car?" Beckett sounded irritated at first. "That's sweet of him." She allowed a slight smile to cross her lips at the thought of Castle's obvious affection.

"Ohh girl, I was gonna knock you upside if you said anything other than that. Castle is going all out for you." Lanie teased. "I guess it really pays to become a best selling pulp fiction writer's muse."

Beckett rolled her eyes at her friend before leaning back into her seat.

_"I know why. He said he loves me." _she thought to herself, still unable to accept what Castle was offering to her. _"But I should not take advantage of him because of it. " _

The trip to Castle's house was uneventful. There was an uneasy silence between Beckett and her dad. He knew what he wanted to tell her but refrained, mostly because he felt she was still too weak to hear what he had to say. For the meantime, he was going to do what Castle asked of him. He wasn't going to abandon her. She needed him and he would try to be there for her.

The buzz at the door made Castle jump from his seat where he was enjoying a bit of Scotch after freshening up for his guests. He had hired a catering service for lunch and they were almost done with the lunch set up.

"Here we go kiddo!" He heard his mother's encouraging voice coming down the stairs.

"I'll get the door! Alexis, Beckett's here!" Castle almost slipped over the area rug in his haste to beat his mother to the door.

"Kate! Welcome home!" He smiled brightly at the people standing at his doorway, motioning for them to come in.

She looked a lot less paler than before but still weak. Her statuesque figure was nowhere to be found as she seemed to be leaning forward in an effort to lessen the pain that she was feeling. Her breathing was still heavy. Castle was immediately at her side and assisting her to the recliner he had purchased just a few days before specifically for her use.

"Thank you Rick." she whispered. It still hurt her to speak sometimes. She tried to sit up straight in the chair but her chest just hurt too much.

"Hey guys!" Alexis came down the stairs with Ashley on her heels. He had decided to stay for lunch at the insistence of Castle after they had come back from Serendipity and then announced that they had lunch plans so Alexis would not be home to greet Beckett.

"Ashley, how about you show Jim and Lanie where Kate will be staying?" Castle pointed to the bags near the door.

"Let me help." Alexis quickly volunteered.

"Lunch is ready." Martha announced. "Do the bags later."

"This is quite a set up Castle laid out for you here." Lanie threw herself onto the bed beside Kate. They had just finished a hearty lunch with Beckett excusing herself before coffee to rest. Ashley and Alexis had gone off to spend the rest of the day together. Martha had received a call from her architect asking her to come down to the school. That left just her, Lanie, Castle, and her dad in the house. The two men were in Castle's office sharing a cup of coffee.

The room had a queen sized bed, 32 inch flat screen and a Mac on the desk fronting a picturesque window view of the city. The down pillows and bed made the two women feel like they were in a 5-star hotel rather than a bedroom in one of the most expensive penthouses in New York.

"What's the number for room service?" Lanie joked.

"Lanie, I need to talk to you." Beckett's serious tone changed the mood in the room immediately.

"About?"

Beckett tried to plop over on her stomach to talk to Lanie. A move which immediately had a sharp, breath stealing pain shoot through her whole body. She propped some pillows against the headboard instead.

"At the cemetery... I've been having these dreams. Seeing images. I can't tell which is real and which is something my brain might have made up."

"What images?"

"Castle running towards me, crouched over me, I felt paralyzed with fear and pain... then..." she bit her lower lip, trying not to smile as she recalled a memory which she was not sure was real.

"Then?" Lanie prodded her.

"He was crying. Asking me to stay. Not to leave him. I think Castle said he loved me."

Lanie's hand shot up to her mouth in surprise.

"I... I'm not even sure if he said it or if I imagined it all." Beckett tried to nip her friend's excitement in the bud.

"Well ask him!" Lanie suddenly sat up in bed.

"You know I can't do that!" Beckett thought she had raised her voice but she actually had not.

"Why not?" Sometimes Beckett's pride really irritated Lanie.

"I just can't!"

"What's stopping you?" Lanie stood up from the bed and placed her hands over her hips. Ready to scold her convalescing friend.

"What if he never said it? Can you imagine how embarrassing that would be?"

"I could just slap the two of you silly sometimes! If you don't ask him, I will!" Lanie jokingly threatened.

"Lanie..."

"Alright. I won't say anything. But you better do something about that memory before not knowing drives you crazy."

**TBC**

_**A/N: 3 Chapters into the story and I already have 7 reviews. I'd like to thank everyone who have given me encouraging words. I hope I can deliver a highly entertaining story that you can all enjoy :-) Your reviews give me the inspiration to keep going. Thanks everyone. **_


	4. Pandora's Envelope

**Chapter 4: Pandora's Envelope**

It was Jim Beckett's second time at the Castle penthouse. This time he had the opportunity to see every part of the house. The last time he was here, he and Castle had a serious talk that had them limited to the breakfast nook. Now he had a chance to see those favorite areas that his daughter often gushed about to him. He had a picture in his mind of what it looked like since Kate gave him highly graphic descriptions of the home that she seemed so comfortable in.

Seeing her in what he considered to be strange surroundings for the first time, his daughter surrounded by Rick, Martha, and Alexis during lunch reminded him of the close relationship she had with these people. In fact, if he had not known that his daughter and this man were not a couple, he could swear that they were so in love and married. The way they treated each other so lovingly, there was just no mistaking what they felt for each other. Kate in this situation showed him a side of his daughter that he never thought he would see, a side that belonged to a family, Alexis spoke to Beckett with the respect of a child to her step mother and Rick, acted almost as if he were married to Kate. Tending to her needs and preempting any needs she might have. Kate reciprocating with kind words and a loving gaze or a touch of the hand that she thought no one else saw. Indeed, that was probably all that was missing between these two. But he would let them figure that out for themselves.

Castle had suggested that the two of them retire to his office with their coffee mugs while waiting for Lanie to finish helping Kate unpack. Since it had been almost 3 weeks since he was last in the area, his personal mail had gotten stacked up on his desk. A sea of manila envelopes mixed with smaller letter sized envelopes were strewn across the table. Now he knew why his mother was warning him that she saw a snake slithering about his desk. His mother and her overactive imagination...

"Is this all just fan mail?" Jim asked as he settled into the nearby visitors chair.

"No. This is just my personal mail. My readers no longer send me fan mail. They seem to prefer tweeting and leaving messages on my facebook wall these days. Writing letters seems to be a dying art form." he sounded sad as he thought of the demise of one of the pillars of the writing world. "My agent takes care of forwarding the more important or interesting fan messages to me. Then I reply to them in the same way. It saves me a ton of hours trying to decipher hand written notes to Gastle, Caskett, or somebody else. Sometimes I wonder about those names. Whatever happened to Samantha, Robert, and David? Why would parents name their kids Pilot Inspektor or Itza Ma Boat?" He shuddered at the thought of the strange names that he used to come across in the mail. "Now I only see names like that as Tweeter and Facebook identities. At least I hope they are alternate identities of a real name."

Jim stifled a yawn while Castle was talking. It wasn't that he was bored. He was just so tired after waking up so early to get himself ready to pick up Kate.

"You can crash on the couch and take a nap." Castle offered. "I just need to go over some of these envelopes."

"Not a bad idea. Thanks Rick."

Castle picked up the first stack of envelopes and sorted them into piles. "Bills, bills, bills, junk, junk, junk, mine, mine, mine, bills, junk, whoa!" he exclaimed when he came to the big yellow manila envelope addressed to him from Roy Montgomery.

"Something wrong?" Jim sat up from the couch. Castle looked ashen.

"It's from Montgomery." he carefully opened the envelope and laid the contents out on his desk. "Jim, you have to see this."

Lying before Castle were a number of bursting at the seams police evidence report envelopes. All labeled "Johanna Beckett."

"What the... Rick, what's this all about?" Jim felt himself go weak at the knees. They each took an envelope and read its contents. He knew all about the evidence that Kate had gathered over time but these seemed different from those. There was something "complete" about these. "Are these what I think they are?"

Castle was already preoccupied with reading the note from the captain that came with the folders. His jaw was heavy set, his shoulders hunched forward in an uneasy posture.

_Rick, _

_I took Kate in all those years ago in order to protect her from the Dragon. I knew she wasn't going to give up looking into her mother's case unless somebody made it impossible for her to ever solve it. That's why I took these original case files from the records and left what she thinks are the actual case files. I had a deal with the Dragon. For as long as Kate stayed away from her mother's case, he wasn't going to kill her. Kate can never find out who the Dragon is. She can never have a chance to expose him. The cost would be too great for any of us who love her to bear. But your arrival changed all of that. You put her in a position wherein it became next to impossible for me to protect her. I am not going to leave her without any protection if I can help it. That is why I sent these files to you. _

_I know that you are a very bright man and you love Kate more than she will ever be willing to accept. Help her close this case. You have everything you need to do it right here. I can't tell you who the Dragon is because I know you are going to tell her and it would take an act of God to stop the two of you from going rogue and possibly dying together in the process. Piece it together without telling her. If you confirm the identity of the Dragon, for chrissakes don't tell her who it is unless you are absolutely sure she isn't going to charge head first into an emotional darkness from which she might never return. She needs closure Rick. But only you can give it to her, when you know the time is right. _

_I've tried to fix it so that nobody can hurt her anymore. Not even the Dragon. But if my plan fails, all she's got is you Rick. You are her partner, the other half of her soul. She'll come around. Don't give up on her. No matter how angry she may get at you, just remember, she loves you more than she is willing to admit to herself too. Just stay strong for her. She will need it in the future. _

_Roy_

Shaking himself out of the concentration he had fallen into while reading the letter, he realized that he had a decision to make. Here was everything that Kate needed to get her mother's killer. To help her get onto the road towards personal happiness. All it would take was a knock on her door. One knock and everything will be over for her. She would be free of the ghost of her mother's death.

"Don't do it Rick. If you love my daughter you won't tell her these files exist." Jim advised him after they had looked over all the information in the envelope. It was all just a blur of disorganized information right now. They needed a murder board to sort and sift through the documents they had.

"But this is the break she's been waiting for. This will help her heal emotionally." Castle tried to reason with Jim. "Kate's nightmare has to end sometime."

"Not in her condition. Not right now. Not in the immediate future. Rick, there is a lot more at stake now than just her mother's case." Jim closed the folder and faced Rick from across the couch. Castle was seated behind his office desk.

Castle looked down into the documents and pictures from the files. He was a torn man. He wasn't ready to be Kate's ultimate protector. He already failed once. What if he failed again?

"Rick, I am not saying that we will never tell her. What I am saying is that we should only let her know certain information whenever necessary. And you will have to be creative about it. She should never know you have these folders." he gathered the documents into the assigned folders while he spoke.

"I don't want Kate to hate me. I'm on thin ice as it is. I don't even know if I am still her partner at this point. She kicked me to the curb before Roy died. "

"She won't. Listen to me Rick. I know my daughter. You can tell her all about these folders, after you make her realize that there is more to her life, that she has the right to live and be happy, that her happiness is what matters the most to the person who loves her the most." he paused in order to gather his thoughts. "Tell her when she already knows and accepts that she has to live for herself, for you, for what the two of you have. Her mother's case can't be the central point of her existence. Once you accomplish that, you can tell her anything."

The two men sat in silence for a few minutes. Then Castle stood up and took down the Stairwell painting behind his desk to reveal a digital biometric safe.

"She will never see these files until the time is right." he promised.

The medicines that Beckett was one kept her asleep for most of the afternoon. Castle turned the baby monitor receiver on after Lanie and Jim had left. Her breathing was steady and even. She seemed to not be having the nightmares that used to constantly visit her while she was in a coma at the hospital. The nightmares that left Rick feeling helpless while she was talking unconsciously in her sleep. Nightmares that only stopped when he took her into his arms and he whispered their special word, "Always Kate. Always."

He took the envelope out of the safe and studied the pictures of the people involved in the case. It appeared that Montgomery had been conducting his own personal investigation into the case, a case that seemed to reach into upper most echelons of the police department Rick did not know how or even where to begin.

There was one picture though. The picture of a man that he seemed to be constantly drawn to. There was something familiar about him, if only Rick could put his finger on it.

"Richard, I'm back from the school. How is our patient doing?" Martha walked into his office, catching him off guard. He hurriedly gathered up the folders and dumped them into the safe.

"What is going on here?" she asked him. "Are you working on a case without Beckett?"

"What? No, I can't do that. I need Beckett to be with me before I can enter a crime scene. I can't work with anyone else." Castle responded. "These are files pertaining to Beckett's mom's case."

"Richard, she almost died pursuing this thing. Will you never let it go? Will she never let it go? Does one of you have to die for this insane fixation to end?" She was seriously worried about the safety of her son. More so now that Beckett had almost become a part of his past instead of his future like she wanted for him.

"It's not what you think mother." he tried to explain while he put everything back into the safe.

"Then what is all this?" His mother picked up a few stray pictures and held it out to him. But she suddenly withdrew her hand when she saw the picture on top. The very picture that Rick had been staring at for the past 2 hours. The look on her face told him that she knew who the man was.

"Is he familiar to you mother?" he asked her as he took the pictures, leaving the picture in question out of the folder. Maybe his mother could help him place the fellow.

'No... no, I don't know him. I have to go change." Martha hurriedly walked away from her son. Afraid of what she might say if she stayed in the same room with him a minute longer.

Martha sat shaking at her dresser. It had been over 38 years since she last saw that man in the picture. She did not particularly relish the thought of having seen him again. What did he have to do with the murder of Johanna Beckett? Why could he not remain in her silent past? The past where she buried him in order to protect herself and her son from his evil and manipulative ways.

**TBC**

**A/N: I know this was shorter than the previous chapters but I thought that it would be best to end this chapter here. The next chapters fall under a different scenario that would not fit the mood of this chapter. **


	5. Breakfast, Monitors, and The Hamptons

**Chapter 5: Breakfast, Monitors, and The Hamptons**

**A Week Later**

Castle had been spoiling her so much over the past week. Not wanting her to do anything for herself. He seemed to be able to read her mind. It was almost as it they could communicate telepathically. When Lanie was over a few days earlier, they had gotten to talking about how much they wanted to have a burger and shake from Remy's. Within an hour Castle was in her room with exactly that. They wondered how he had guessed it but decided not to let it bother them. If only Kate knew how Castle was really doing it.

It was still dark out when Kate woke up. Her medicines had worn off sooner than expected and she was feeling stronger with each day that passed. She felt strong. Strong enough to go down and surprise the Castle family with breakfast. She glanced at the clock, it was 5:00 AM. Surely it wasn't too soon to get started in the kitchen. Slowly getting out of bed, she freshened up and headed down to prepare the meal. She opened the fridge and scanned for breakfast items. She was greeted by shelves full of international cheeses, eggs, bacon, turkey bacon, ham, milk, juice... This was one family that sure knew how to eat a balanced meal. She took out the eggs, milk, and bacon. French Toast would be the order of the day, if she could find the bread that is.

The baby monitor was hidden in the fruit basket on the breakfast counter and picked up the sound of her movement. The receiver sitting on Castle's bedside immediately relayed the sound of Kate softly whistling as she worked in the kitchen. He stirred in his sleep, thinking he was dreaming. But then the sound of the Espresso machine cut into his sleep and woke him. What in the devil was Kate doing at this hour? He sprang out of bed and ran into the kitchen.

"Kate? Are you okay?" He asked as he wiped the sleep from his eyes. He could smell the butter melting in the pan and he saw the bread soaked in milk.

"Rick, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you." She was choosing some fresh fruit to run through the blender for a smoothie.

"Not at all. I always wake up at this hour." He yawned and stretched his arms out. If Kate wasn't going to sleep then neither was he. He walked over the the pot of fresh coffee and started to pour himself a cup.

"Wait!" she stopped him before he could pour the coffee. "Let me make an espresso for you."

"It's okay. I got it." he smiled at her. She had never offered to make coffee for him before.

"But I want to..." she stopped herself mid sentence. What was she thinking?

Their eyes locked for a few moments before he backed off. He handed her the coffee cup and took a seat on the other side of the breakfast bar. He could not help but feel that something was right about what they were doing. It felt natural. It felt like they each belonged here.

"Then tell me what I can do to help."

"I was going to make some smoothies for Martha and Alexis." she motioned to the fruit bowl.

"Smoothies all around!" He announced as Kate pushed the fruit bowl towards him. He missed catching it, sending the bowl crashing to the floor. The baby monitor suddenly losing its cover.

"What the hell Rick? Were you spying on me?" their moment was gone. Replaced by a furious looking Kate who was now holding the monitor in her hand. She walked directly to where he was standing and poked him so hard he knew it would leave a mark. His mother did try to warn him.

"It's not what you think Beckett!" Castle immediately reverted to their professional names. This wasn't Kate he was talking to right now and he knew it.

"What did I tell you about bugging people? Do you ever listen to me Castle?" So now they were back to the last name basis. "How could you do this to me? The burgers! You have my room bugged!"

"Beckett... I..." she held up a hand to interrupt him.

"Show me. Now." she took deep breaths, as deep as her injury would allow anyway.

"Richard! Kate! What is going on down there?" Martha's voice was coming down the stairs. Seeing the monitor in Kate's hand she turned to her son. "I told you it wasn't going to work. You should have told her!"

"Mother, you're not helping." Castle warned.

"Castle, focus! The monitors, I want them out! No more listening in on me! No more spying!"

"What's that smell?" Martha asked. It smelled like burning eggs.

"My toast!" Beckett made her way back to the stove and turned off the flame. "Breakfast is ruined! You ruined it Castle! You ruined everything!" She turned and ran back to her room.

"Beckett!" Castle called out after her. Martha held him back from following her. "You know you brought this upon yourself."

xoxoxo

Her wound started to hurt again. Getting emotional was not good for her. She knew that Castle meant well. He always did. He always had her back. She knew that he put those monitors in place with the best intentions. It is just that she wasn't used to having others take care of her. It was difficult for her to accept their kindness and care because after her mother died, she was pretty much on her own. The Kate Beckett that she was today was somebody who was created out of need and strength. But when she was with Castle, she changed. She was more vulnerable and trusting of this man. Which is why having her betray even the slightest of her trust hurt her to the pit of her emotions.

All of those crazy emotions running through her were aggravated by her beginning to get restless. She hated being cooped up in the penthouse without anything to do. The workaholic in her needed a release. She needed the adrenaline rush that being at the precinct offered. Just hearing the stories from Lanie and the others was not enough. She needed to be in the thick of action with... Castle by her side? Nothing was making sense to her. She needed to get a grip. She needed to get away from where she was. She needed... Her surroundings suddenly went black.

xoxoxo

"What was that?" Castle heard the sound of something hitting the floor come across the monitor. He bound up the stairs 3 at a time. Kate was sprawled out on the floor, unconscious. He picked her up and set her on the bed. He checked her stitches to make sure that the wound had not reopened.

He reached for the bedside telephone and dialed a number. "Yeah, Lanie. I need your help..."

xoxoxo

"Castle..." Beckett was finally coming round. Lanie was sitting at the computer table updating her facebook account.

She could not help but smile. The first name that crossed her friend's lips was the name of the man she refused to acknowledge as the man she loved. She could deny it all she wanted, but this proved the opposite.

"Honey, you fainted." Lanie came over to her as Kate began to sit up in bed. "What is the last thing you remember?"

"Castle and I were arguing..." she tried to remember more, then it hit her. "Has he removed the monitors?"

"Yes he has." Lanie could not help but refrain from giggling. When she arrived at the penthouse with Ryan and Esposito, Castle was crawling around with a basket, collecting the monitors he had strewn all over the place. The men were currently downstairs sharing a cold one. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No. There's nothing to discuss. He violated my trust and that is the end of it." She looked seriously at Lanie before continuing. "I need to move back to my place."

"You go ahead and do that. Let's see how soon all the reserve energy Castle has spent building up in you gets wasted." Lanie answered.

"I can't stay here. I should never have stayed here."

"Don't look a gift horse in the mouth Kate. You would never have recovered this fast without his help."

"I'm not. It's just that, things seem to be getting complicated. I can't, I don't know how much longer I can control myself." Kate began opening up to her best friend about what she feared the most.

"Go on, I'm listening." Lanie encouraged her.

"I keep thinking about what he might have said. I want to ask him but I know I shouldn't. All this uncertainty is driving me up the wall. I need to know! Need to be sure! Then, I keep thinking about how much I want to nail the sniper too. But then I think, if I go after the sniper, Castle would be in danger. I could never forgive myself if he ended up hurt because of me. I need him to leave me for his own safety. I need him to leave me because..." Kate stopped. Knowing that she would never be able to take back the words that were to come next, not even if she only told her best friend about it.

"Listen to yourself. You are so totally in denial. You've got to face what happened sometime Kate. My advice, stop running and start working things out with him. Don't let all this slip away without even trying." Lanie headed to the door. "I'll let them know you are awake. Come join us downstairs."

xoxoxo

A friendly game of poker was ongoing by the time Beckett had joined the group in the play area. Esposito seemed to be the big winner so far. They were having an animated discussion about the temporary team assignments they were on while Beckett was recuperating.

"Hey Beckett!" They each greeted her as she took the last remaining seat which conveniently, was right beside Castle.

"Hey, I've missed you guys!" she smiled at them and tried to ignore Castle who was looking at her with a hopeful look on his face. Hoping that she would finally talk to him again.

The uneasiness between the two was not lost on the group. Castle had already briefed them about the earlier events so they already knew the kind of mood Beckett would be in once she finally joined them. Esposito had already punched him on the side of his arm for being a stupid ass. Ryan had already tried to explain why he would do the same thing if it had happened to Jenny, much to the annoyance of Lanie and Esposito. Lanie, well, she would let Beckett handle him.

"I can't believe the two of you are spending all this vacation time cooped up in here." Lanie broke the air of silence in the room.

"Yeah, you two need to take a vacation. Take advantage of the 3 months sick leave Beckett." Esposito suggested. He took his cue from Lanie whom he knew was rooting for these two to work things out just as he was.

"Jenny and I planned to go to L.A. and hit the beaches, but I can't seem to make the time." Ryan chimed in with disappointment in his voice.

"Taking the edge off helps a lot." Lanie explained. "Sometimes, that's all that's needed to make sense of a mess."

Both Castle and Beckett knew what Lanie was driving at as they gazed into each others eyes. Silently communicating. Knowing that they would eventually work this out. It was just a matter of who would make the first move. Castle or Beckett?

xoxoxo

**Early Friday Morning**

Castle lightly knocked on the door to Beckett's room. Careful not to wake Alexis who was sleeping in the next room. "Beckett, are you awake?"

She wasn't really sleeping. The words of Lanie from the night before kept running through her mind. Maybe Lanie was on to something.

"Come in Castle." she sat up in bed and straightened herself out a bit.

"Get packed. We're gonna take the edge off. We both need to get away from here for a few days." He spoke softly upon entering the room.

"What do you mean?"

"You. Me. Road trip." Castle explained.

"We can't leave your mom and Alexis..." Beckett stammered. The last thing she wanted to handle right now was being alone with Castle.

"We can and we will. Alexis already has plans to stay with Ashley and his parents at their beach house. Mother needs to oversee the construction site, it's just you and me." he explained.

"I can't just go off with you to God knows where!" she protested.

"God knows where we're going. To my Hamptons rest house." He explained.

Beckett could not believe what she was hearing. There was no way she going to THAT house.

"No. Nope. Never gonna happen. Not now, not ever."

"What have you got against the Hamptons? Or is it just me you enjoy rejecting?" He was insinuating to the past when he thought Beckett had gone on vacation with Demming at the Hamptons.

_"I am not going anywhere that you spent intimate time with Gina or God knows whom else! "_ Becket thought and actually wanted to shout out. "Rick, I just can't okay. I know you are a playboy and everything but I just can't go to the Hamptons. Not to your house."

Rick seemed to have guessed what she was trying to imply. " I bought this house after I divorced Alexis' mom but before I married Gina." he was scrounging through her closet for an overnight bag. "But Gina never had the time to go down there with me. I also make it a policy never to bring down any women I don't care about to the Hamptons. So only my mother and Alexis have actually been the women in the house."

"Uh... Hamptons, last summer, you left arm in arm with Gina, you never called me? Does any of that ring a bell? " Becket referred to her saddest summer ever. That was the summer she thought she had totally lost Castle to another woman. She remembered how lousy she felt at the time. She could barely keep it together at the precinct and she wished it was Castle calling each time any of her phones rang. She never really forgave him for putting her through all that misery.

Castle let out a beaming smile as he set her overnight bag on her bed. "Get packing." he ordered. "No, we did not stay at my house. My publisher has a house on the beach that they allow their contracted writers to use when they are writing. It was like being at a beachfront work center. That is where we stayed. Nothing was enjoyable about those 3 months away from you. "

She did not hold back the relief and smile that she felt coming across her face. So what if he knew? Then the thought hit her. Could he have also been pining after her those 3 months they were apart? Did she really have him pegged so wrong?

Beckett got out of bed and started packing. Itwas now or never.

**TBC**

**A/N: Most of you have already tried to guess about who the guy in the picture is. I am not confirming nor denying anything at this point. I do strongly suggest that you follow the story because that picture is pivotal to the plot. Till the next update :-)**


	6. Taking The Edge Off

**Chapter 6: Taking The Edge Off**

"Blip-blip." Lanie's cellular phone alerted her to the newly arrived text message. She stirred in bed to get out of the spooning position she was in with Esposito. She could not help but smile and feel a sense of excitement at the text message as she read it.

_From: K. Beckett_

_Message: _

_It's the writer and his muse, off to the Hamptons for the weekend. See you soon. I hope you are right. _

Lanie set the phone back on the bedside table and settled back into sleep. Spooning against Esposito's naked chest. She and Beckett were going to need to have a slumber party when she got back.

xoxoxo

The Ferrari pulled into the private driveway of Castle's West Hampton beachfront house. The spectacular ocean view was the first thing that Kate noticed while they were driving into the property. The blue waters were so inviting that she was already feeling hot enough to go take a dip in the Atlantic ocean that was part of the house's private beach area. And the house, the magnificent house that took her breath away the minute she set eyes upon it. She could not help but wonder if this was really where he planned to take her if she had gone with him that past summer.

"Is this for real Castle?" she could not help but ask after they had gotten into the main house. The guestroom looked like it could fit in Kate's whole apartment with room to spare. It was to be expected. The house had 5 bedrooms and a jacuzzi after all.

He smiled as he set down her bags in her room. It was located directly opposite to his own master bedroom. It seemed that he and Alexis were often at this house, Castle did not really pack a suitcase for himself, just toiletries. And the room assigned to Alexis looked almost exactly like the one she had at the penthouse.

"I don't know about you but I'm famished." Castle told her after they had freshened up and met up on the patio. Aside from a pretzel and tall coffee cup each that they picked up on the way out of the city, neither of them had eaten anything solid yet.

Kate glanced at her watch. Was it that late already?

"So, what does one do for food around here? Do we cook something up or what?" she asked him.

"Oh. Ummm... normally we bring food up here with us. But since this was a spur of the moment thing, I don't think we have anything except Perrier in the pantry and Scotch in the bar. Maybe some ice in the freezer. Let me see if we have any half a year old TV dinner we can heat up." he joked.

"Castle!" Beckett shouted in the manner that she always used when she wanted him to focus his concentration on something.

"We can go to the farmer's market and buy foodstuff to whip up!" he volunteered while he instinctively covered his nose and ear with each hand. He knew that tone of voice and it oftentimes involved him hollering "Apples! Apples!" at her while she had his nose or ear in her hand that had a vise like grip.

" Ok I'll drive. " Beckett told him as they started down the steps.

"Drive? Kate, you're in the Hamptons. The center of nature in New York. Vacationers don't drive around if they can help it. I suggest that we get there ATP style." he motioned for her to follow him.

"ATP style?" she followed him to the closed garage where he kept their bicycles.

He produced 2 Huffy cruiser bicycles. One obviously belonged to Alexis and the other to Castle.

"Alternative Travel Project. There's this Canadian actress named Stana Katic, it's her pet project. I met her on a book tour once for Nikki Heat. I told her I would help promote it whenever I could. It's all about lessening hazardous air emissions and staying healthy by taking alternative modes of transportation whenever you can. If we hadn't already cast Natalie Rhodes in the role, she would have made the perfect Nikki Heat. She could be your twin..." Castle rambled on and on and on so that Beckett decided to hold back in pedaling if only not to hear his story anymore.

xoxoxo

Beckett never thought that she could have so much fun shopping at the fresh produce market with Castle. The man obviously knew his produce and fresh meats. It got her to thinking that there was more to the Castle Onion, to paraphrase his description of her in the past. They bought so much food that they could probably stay at the vacation house for at least a week and not go hungry.

It was a slow and leisurely ride back to the house. They stopped by the local Ben and Jerry's on the way home at Castle's insistence. Taking bites out of each others ice cream treat and playing around on the way back to the bicycles had her laughing most of the time. Hearing her laugh made Castle feel light. It was nice to know that he could still make her laugh even though she was still sore at him for the baby monitors.

They pretended to race up the driveway once the got back onto the private road. Beckett let Castle win. Chest pains be damned, she was enjoying herself too much in his company to actually feel a need to be competitive with him. He was standing at the top of the patio when she got there. His shirt all wet and his face dripping with sweat. There was something she found really sexy about the way he looked at that moment. This was actually the first time that she had ever seen him in a fitted tee and summer shorts. The direct counterpart to what she was wearing which was jeans shorts and a blue sleeveless summer blouse topped with a flimsy white cardigan.

xoxoxo

There seemed to be something about this trip that gave her extra energy. Her pains seem to have faded and she felt lighter than she did starting the trip. Maybe it was not having any reminder of the nightmare that she had just been through that did it. Maybe it was having Castle there for her without any distractions from their cases, his family, or whatever else usually kept them apart during the day. She picked up one of the folding lounge chairs and carried to the beach. Listening to the waves crash onto the shore seemed to have an even more relaxing and calming effect on her. She did not even notice that she had already dozed off.

Castle was watching her sleep from the patio while he drank his coffee. He was a highly contented man at that very moment. Here he was, living his dream. The dream of having Beckett by his side at this very house. Sharing his life in some way. He smiled when she stirred in her sleep and changed positions. She had slid down the chair a bit. He put down his cup, walked over to her and carried her sleeping form up to his room.

She automatically relaxed in his arms and sighed. "Castle..." he felt a sense of pride at having his name escape her lips as she snuggled deeper into the his chest, oblivious to the fact that she was in his loving arms at that very moment.

xoxoxo

She opened her bedroom windows to let the fresh air in after she woke up from her nap. Beckett had no recollection of how she got from the beach to the bed but she had an inkling that Castle had something to do with that. A thought that brought a sheepish smile to her face.

He was just swimming back to the shore when she saw him. His muscles rippling and forming mounds across his arms and abs that she had never seen before because of the way they dressed at the precinct or when they were undercover. Come to think of it, she did not even see him in swimming trunks when they were together in Los Angeles. What a treat this was for her! He had just ran up to the shore and picked up a towel to dry off when he looked up and saw her standing there, watching him. Embarrassed, she tried to move away from the picture windows

"Beckett! Beckett!" He waved his towel towards her room, trying to gain her attention. She decided to show herself, there was nothing else she could do about it. "The water's great! Grab your suit! C'mon!"

Smiling at him she signaled for him to wait for her. She held her thumb and index finger together forming an O with her remaining 3 fingers up, meaning ok. Beckett was going to go to him. The one advantage of having this private piece of beach was that she did not have to worry about anybody else seeing her scar while she wore her suit. Castle had already seen it at the hospital and it did not matter at all to him.

They played like two teenagers in love in the water. Under water breath holding competitions were the order of the afternoon since a strenuous swim would not be good for her. Hugging whenever their small playful moments allowed it, thus removing any romantic connotations from the act, and massaging each other through the towels (for warmth) whenever they got out of the water.

Neither of them wanted to say it. They both knew that they did not want the day to end. But end their day did as they sat by the bonfire they created together, warming up side by side, covered in towels. They would have to go back inside soon. The weather was getting cold.

"Thank you so much for forcing me to do this Castle. I'm really enjoying myself." She smiled at him while she rubbed his back over the towel that covered him.

"I'm glad it's taking the edge off for you Beckett. I guess Lanie was right after all." he responded by putting his arm around her and not really moving it. She did not make a move to brush it off so he let it rest over her for a while.

They just sat there in silence. Each one engrossed in their own thoughts. They knew that the time was right if they wanted to do it. Whatever it was. Their eyes met in a loving gaze. Each knowing that the other wanted something to happen but was afraid to make the first move.

Beckett's eyes searched Castle's for the answer to the question that had been bothering her since the day she was shot. Did he really say it? Why couldn't he say it now? She was wide awake and in full control of herself. She could reciprocate now. She wanted so badly to reciprocate. She tried to make her eyes tell him what she wanted him to do. What she wanted to hear him say. The words that she needed to hear. The very emotions that would help her let go of the nightmare that was her mother's case if he asked it of her.

He could see the questions running through her eyes. Her uncertainty at what was going on at the moment. He wanted to ask her if she remembered. He wanted to know if his nightmare was over. If she felt the same way as he did. His emotions were driving him crazy. He wanted to just grab her and kiss her until their lips both bled. But he needed to hold himself in check. He would not do anything until she actually showed him that it would be alright for him to do it. He respected her too much to take advantage of her. No, this was not the place or time.

"Beckett, we better get started on dinner. It's almost 9 pm. We need to get you into bed soon. You must be very tired by now." he stood up and held his hand out to help her get up.

He saw the hurt and disappointment in her eyes. He looked away because he did not know what else to do or say. He could not let on that he read the message she was conveying. Instead, he took her hand in his and held it up against the fire light. Her hand disappeared into his. He smiled at her and winked mischievously. It was a sign, a sign from the universe. They would have their time to become one eventually. No sense in rushing the universe. Everything would happen for them when the time was right.

**TBC**

**A/N: A shorter than normal chapter for me. But I felt the need to end the story here because I want this vacation to cover at least 2 chapters. I have what I believe to be some pretty good ideas about how they might spend a weekend at the Hamptons. Please be patient. It'll be worth the wait :-)**

**P.S. Special thanks to** **AlyssaGoode & merry-merry-me for catching a few errors that got past me in the first round. This version reflects the edits that were needed so I could move on to the next chapter without loop holes and major bloopers. I also did a bit of research and found out that it is possible for a gunshot wound to the chest to start healing or be shallowly healed in a month if the person is physically fit. Which we all know Beckett is. So my healing time and factors presented to support it seem to be right on track.  
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	7. Confession Time

**Chapter 7: Confession Time**

Maybe they were just two people with the lousiest timing in life. Or maybe, they were both just to afraid to face the reality of their situation. He had already told her what he felt for her when she lay bloody and almost lifeless in his arms. Now he was waiting for her to show a sign that she heard him, that she remembered. She wasn't sure of what she heard. She needed him to give her a clue, let her know that she was not hallucinating at the time. Would the time for them to finally become secure about their places in each others lives eventually come?

The familiarity they shared as they moved about the house, first in the kitchen preparing their dinner, then in the dining room, and finally in the living room showed just how familiar they were with each other. How comfortable they had become over the past 3 years, and how they were so in sync that neither of them needed words to know what the other was thinking or needed. They just always knew how to respond to each other. Maybe they did know how each other felt.

They had finally made their way up to the bedrooms after locking up. Standing outside their doors, neither of them wanted to be the first to break the mood by going to bed. Beckett, who had been trying to hide her shortness of breath from Castle for most of the night, did not want him to worry about her. But he mentioned that she didn't look well and thought that it might be a bad idea for her to be in bed alone.

"Richard Castle, are you implying..." her tone was actually teasing.

"Truly platonic I swear!" He held his hand up in a boy scout swearing motion.

"You were never a scout. " she reminded him.

"Okay, on the word of your partner then. " he really did not like the way she was looking. She seemed to be turning a shade of blue right in front of him.

Little did he know that she was actually too afraid to go to bed. It was getting more and more difficult for her to breath but she tried not to let on because she did not want to ruin their weekend with a visit to the hospital. Castle had gone through extra lengths to make this vacation one of the very best she ever had and he deserved to see it to the end.

"How about you stay in my room with me? We've got the same bed size anyway." the cop in her still wanted to control the situation even though she knew that she was not in a position to make any demands of the owner of the house.

"Let me grab my pillow and blanket." He disappeared into his room and resurfaced in what seemed like the blink of an eye.

They lay rigid on their assigned bed sides, each one afraid to move in case it be misconstrued by the other party. This was all about companionship and making sure that Beckett was alright. No strings attached.

He had practically memorized the rhythm to her breathing. She had closed her eyes almost the minute he lay beside her so she did not see how he was studying her features. Committing every curve of her face, the shape and color of her lips to his memory, he could not imagine what his life would be like if anything happened to her. No, he was never going to let her go. He would have to find the right time to tell her what he had already told her at the cemetery. He needed to know that she felt the same way.

It was because he was intently studying her that he noticed how her breathing was becoming more difficult, more labored. Something was going on that she was not telling him about.

"Beckett?" he nudged her to make sure she was fine. She did not respond.

"Kate?" He held his face close to her face for a minute. She wasn't breathing!

"Kate! No! Kate! Wake up!" he grabbed the telephone and dialed 911.

He left the phone hanging after he had given the information to the dispatcher. He lay her on the floor and began artificial respiration. Her lungs did not seem to be filling with air no matter how much he blew into her.

"Kate! Stay with me! Don't do this! Not again!" He begged her.

He could not even remember how the EMT got into the room. All he could see was Kate, unmoving and seemingly lifeless. The EMT kept asking him questions. Were his answers making any sense? He had no idea what was going in. He felt lost.

"We've got a case possible case of Primary Spontaneous Pneumothorax." the head EMT announced while getting the portable oxygen mask into Beckett. "We need to get her to the hospital for more tests."

That was the second longest ambulance ride of Richard Castle's life.

xoxoxo

"Do you want to go visit your dad?" Ashley offered to accompany Alexis. She had been distracted since they got to the beach house. She seemed to be ignoring his parents and distant.

She was actually quite excited to be spending time with Ashley and his parents until she saw her father's note on the hall table that morning telling her and Grams that he had gone off to the beach with Beckett. Alexis refused to admit it but she was beginning to become jealous of the way her father doted on this woman who was neither his wife, lover, or girlfriend. It was bad enough that he was shadowing her every single day, but after the shooting, Beckett seemed to have become her father's obsession. His days and nights revolved around Beckett and no one else seemed to be allowed inside that bubble. Alexis was convinced that she was losing her father.

"It's fine Ash. My dad may not like the extra company." she responded.

"Then come sit with me." he signaled for her to join him on the patio swing. "It's a lovely night."

She sighed, taking one more glance in the direction of her father's beach house before settling in beside Ashley. She lay her head on his shoulder. Her mind was not on cuddling with her boyfriend that night. Something just seemed off to her.

The lights went on at the house in the distance. She saw lights that looked like ambulance lights being reflected from the house. What was going on down there?

"Ash, Something's going on at my dad's house."

"Let me get my car keys." Ashley drove her over only to see the ambulance pulling out. Nobody was left at the house to talk to. He followed the ambulance to the hospital instead. Alexis jumped out of the car the minute he pulled into the emergency room.

xoxoxo

"Richard Castle, he's my father." Alexis was trying to get information out of the emergency nurse's station.

The nurse looked over the files on the desk. "We don't have a Richard Castle listed. He wasn't admitted here."

"But we followed the ambulance all the way here!" she protested. She was so overcome by worry and grief that she did not notice Ashley walk up to her.

"He's not here. Unless he used a different name." the nurse tried to hide her annoyance by trying to sound helpful instead.

Ashley silently led her away from the station and steered her towards the vacant seats in the waiting area. He had never seen Alexis come this undone in their relationship.

"Ash, they said he isn't here. " he heard the desperation in her voice.

"Maybe he isn't. Or maybe the nurse had a point. Did your dad ever use an alias when checking into hotels or hospitals? We can try other hospitals if you are sure he is in one. "

"I'm positive the ambulance was as our house. Maybe it wasn't my dad with the emergency... Beckett!" Alexis jumped out of her seat. Ashley was left to guess what she meant. The Castle's were a strange and unconventional bunch but he loved Alexis just the same. She gave his life excitement. The kind he would never get out of his stuffy old parents.

"Excuse me miss. Could you try looking for Kate Beckett?"

xoxoxo

Castle was sitting dejectedly outside the x-ray and CT Scan area waiting for news about Beckett. He was trying to wrap his brain around what had just happened. She was fine. they were happy, everything was going so well. What happened? How did it happen. What did he do to make it happen? What did she do? If anything happened to Kate because of him, he would never forgive himself.

"Richard Castle?" the emergency doctor in charge called out from the doorway of the exam rooms.

"Yes?" he stood up and walked over.

"Dr. Blaine. They are wheeling her into her room. We should have the results within an hour. Would you like to wait in her room?"

"Would that be possible?" of course he wanted to!

"Yes. It's nothing serious. She suffered from Primary Spontaneous Pneumothorax of the left lung." the doctor responded.

"Her lung collapsed?" Castle had done some research into the medical area for _Hail of Bullets. _

"Not in a major way. It seems she had some serious trauma recently. My guess is that this has been building up for several days already. Hasn't she complained of shortness of breath or chest pains recently?" The doctor was taking notes in her chart.

"No. She never said anything. But she did faint the other day. She woke up a few hours later. We had a doctor at the house..." Castle decided to stop talking. who knew if what he told this stranger ended up on Page Six? Beckett would be sure to strangle him if she ever found out.

They took the elevator up to the private rooms. "Most of the patients don't even know the have it until they pass out." Dr. Blaine explained.

"Will she be alright?" that was the most important thing for Castle to know at that point. He cared about nothing else.

"Short version. We inflated her lungs in order to make it adhere to the chest cavity again. I want to keep her for 72 hours just to make sure nothing else goes wrong. It's not life threatening at this point. " the doctor explained.

xoxoxo

Castle had kept himself awake for most of the night. Not wanting to be asleep in case she woke up. He was not going to waste another minute of their time together. He had confronted his feelings for her a long time ago. He already told her how he felt. He'd just have to tell her again and hope for the best. He was sure now, after having faced the possibility of almost losing her again, that she was more than his muse. She was his "one and done". There was no one else he could imagine himself being with. If she rejected him, then he would just have to work harder on changing her mind. He had long sensed her attraction to him. He knew she was fighting it every step of the way. It would be up to him to show her that there was no reason for her to keep fighting it. For the first time in his life he wasn't playing the love game. He knew what he felt, and what they had was real.

Her eyes slowly fluttered open. She smelled the pure oxygen flowing directly into her nose. The last thing she remembered was seeing him slip into bed next to her. She was going to make some wise crack about the way he slept in a Green Lantern pajama set when she felt herself just slip out of consciousness.

"Castle..." she saw him watching her. She smiled. Relieved that she had woken up and that he was right there beside her. Beckett felt like she was going to die for a moment back there. She had another chance. She wasn't going to blow it anymore. He had to know. She could not go on like this. They both needed to know what they were, and she was sure that she knew what that meant to them now.

"Beckett..." He kissed the hand that he had grasped since he came into her room. 'Don't ever scare me like that again!" he scolded her.

"Rick, there's something I have to tell you.". She decided to cut to the chase. Why did she need to have a hose stuck up her nose? This was not exactly the way she planned on telling him. Well, she did not really plan on telling him in the near future but it seemed like the universe had other plans for them. She wasn't going to take any more chances.

"Me first." he put his index finger on her lips to shush her. Her eyes told him to go on. There was something in her blue eyes. Was it, expectation? Understanding?

"We've been through hell and back for each other the past 3 years. We've stared death in the face together and beaten it enough times so that the Grim Reaper should know that he can't take either of us that easily." he let out a nervous laugh.

This wasn't the first time he was going to profess his love for a girl. Why did he feel like a teenager in high school doing it then? Could it be because he meant it with every fiber of his being this time?

"Rick..."

"Kate, just let me finish ok? I promise, this isn't a punchline." he lifted her face so that he could look directly into her eyes.

"That day that you came to my _Storm Fall_ book launch. I took one look at you and told myself how different you were from the other women I came across. You stood out for me somehow. The way you carried yourself, so strong and kick-ass, but not androgynous. I was attracted to you." he admitted trying to break eye contact with her.

Beckett's eyes showed shock at what she was hearing. She looked into his eyes and saw his pain. Could he see her pain too? Her eyes told him to continue.

_"God please don't let anybody or anything break this moment." _she silently prayed.

"I was dead when you came into my life Kate. I was going through the motions of life because I had to. Alexis was dependent on me. My mother, they were reasons to stay alive but not keep on living." he swallowed and searched her for understanding in her eyes. What he saw was more than that.

"You revived me Kate. You gave me a reason to live again, to be. You were more than a muse to me. You're special to me. You gave me the greatest gift any woman has given me. Well, aside from Alexis' mother of course." he knew now was not the time for jokes but he could not help it. He was struggling to find the right words.

_"Good God Richard! Just tell her! Kiss her while you are both still young..."._ he could hear his mother's wise words of advice running through his head.

"What I am trying to say Kate, is that what I have with you, what I hope we have between us, it's more than just physical."

She closed her eyes to fight off the tears that were starting to form. She was sure now, he was going to say it and she wasn't going to stop him.

"You've tried so hard to push me away but can't you see that you'll never get rid of me? I won't ever let you. "

"Rick, I don't want you to go." she blurted.

"You don't want me to go because?" he gave her a chance. Maybe it would be easier for her to accept if she said it first. Instead he got awkward silence from her.

"I already told you how I feel at the cemetery but I am not sure if you heard me. I need to say it again." he swallowed, getting ready to say the three sweetest words in the world.

"So I did not dream it up." she smiled sweetly at him.

"Depends. What do you think I said?" he asked knowing the answer already. He smiled at her teasingly.

Kate Beckett suddenly got this mischievous twinkle in her eyes. She was going to play a game. She'd be damned if she said it first.

"Let's see, I think you were asking me to stay with you... something about need?" she smiled knowingly at him.

He knew she was going to tease the hell out of it and he wasn't willing to put up with it. He was going to tease her right back. He lowered his lips to her forehead, her cheeks, her neck, the tip of her nose. Rick pulled the oxygen hose out of her nose gently. They could work on putting it back later.

"Shut up Kate." she was driving him crazy by that point. "You aren't the word master in this relationship." He finally captured those lips that had been driving him to jealous heights over the past years.

She did not fight him off. She surrendered herself to him. He was there for her. He was hers without worry. All she had to do was accept him. Kate only had to say the words she knew he badly wanted to hear. She gently pulled away fro his lips. Not wanting to insult him or make hims stop. He looked at her with a confused look in his eyes. Didn't she want what he was offering? Was she going to break his heart one more time?

'I want to be happy with you Rick." she whispered into his ear. Nipping it lightly as she beamed at him. She felt fantastic! So, this is what truly being in love felt like.

"I love you Kate." He whispered back.

"I know Rick. I remember. " her breathing was heavy now. She just wanted the moment to keep going on.

**TBC**

**A/N: Finally! This was the reason for the 2 day delay in the update. I felt the time was right because I'll be introducing some conflict between Beckett and Alexis as well as wrapping up the story in a few more chapters. I hope you can all stay tuned and see how this all plays out. **

**About the medical condition. Please keep the expert medical opinions to a minimum. This is supposed to be for television. Suspend disbelief whenever you can. I did some research into the condition and felt it was something that I could properly use for the story without dragging it too long. **

**The story does not end here :-) **


	8. A Daughter's Worries, A Mother's Anxiety

**Chapter 8: A Daughter's Worries, A Mother's Anxiety**

Once Alexis had given the name of Beckett to the nurse, it did not take long to find her father's whereabouts. 5th floor, private suite 529. She was relieved to find out that he was not the one confined and that Beckett had not taken a turn for the worst. What worried her instead was the fact that her father did not feel the situation enough to even text her about it. Ever since Beckett had moved in with them, she had become his world. Once in a while allowing her and Grams to visit him in that world. Logic was telling her to understand her father. He felt responsible for her shooting in a way. After all, he was standing almost next to her, he saw the reflection coming from the sniper's position, he had an inkling that something was wrong, and yet he did nothing to prevent it. He was just trying to ease his conscience. The spoiled little royal daughter part of her however, thought of something else. This was a woman who was invading her space, her home, her time with her father. She had so little time left to be with him since she was going to Stanford in January, she wanted to make the most of it. But having Beckett around made it impossible. If Beckett, who was wasn't even her father's girlfriend officially could take him away from her this way, she would hate to see what would happen if they became official.

As they approached the closed door of the suite, Ashley took her aside and made sure that she would be ready for whatever it was that she might see on the other side of the door. He knew that Alexis loved her father dearly. But he also knew that she had a tendency to be a dog in a manger when it came to Castle.

"Things may have changed between your dad and Beckett over the weekend. Are you sure you are ready to face the fact that they might be in an official relationship now?" He stopped her from knocking on the door for a bit.

She took a deep, sad breath. In the past Alexis had been lobbying her father to go out on dates and get serious with a woman who can take care of him. She used to tease him about Beckett, never really dreaming that it might one day become a reality. That her father would get involved with a woman whose life was always on the line and in the process, so was his. Alexis saw Beckett more like an older sister, always ready with advice whenever she needed an older but not too old female voice of reason. Alexis knew deep inside that her father and Beckett were each others perfects, she just needed time to accept that fact.

"Isn't change the only permanent thing in the world Ash? I have to accept the fact that Beckett may be a serious contender for the Stepmother position somehow." She smiled at her boyfriend and knocked on the door.

xoxoxo

Castle was cuddled up to Beckett on the queen sized hospital bed. He held her tightly in his arms, afraid to let go and wake to find out that it was all a dream. That Beckett never said she wanted to be happy with him, that he never was able to tell her that he loved her. He lay his head on top of hers as they both dozed off into dreamland. Satisfaction and contentment written on their faces.

That was the scene that greeted Alexis after she had knocked on the door and entered without waiting to be let in. She was a bit shaken by the position she had found them in, thankful that Ashley had prepared her for the possibility of the situation. The pair remained asleep even as the door closed and the visitors moved about the room.

"Dad...dad..." Alexis lightly nudged his arm to wake him.

His eyes opened up with a bit of surprise in them. But he smiled gently at her and motioned for her to leave the room while he removed Kate's head from his chest where it rested. He kissed her lightly before following Alexis. She had witnessed everything her father had done. She did not need any more confirmation of what was obvious. The two were now in a relationship.

"How did you guys know to come here?" Castle directed his question to his daughter.

"Dad, your house is in full view from the porch of Ashley's parents place. We saw the ambulance lights and rushed over. I thought something had happened to you!" she scolded him.

"What? Of course not... why would you ever think that?"

"You're with Beckett, there's a madman with a gun and bullet with her name on it running around out there! What am I supposed to think?" Alexis no longer tried to hide the fear in her voice.

They took the coffee from the vending machine that Ashley had brought back for them. Alexis set her coffee down on the coffee table nearby, hugging her father tightly instead.

"Dad, I worry about you every time you are with Beckett. I don't want to be that kid who gets a call at school telling her that her father is in the morgue! Don't I matter to you? Am I not your number one girl anymore?"

Ashley realized that the father and daughter were having a very personal talk and knew to give them space. He excused himself to go contact his parents. They had gone up to bed early and in their haste to leave they had both forgotten to let his parents know they took the family car.

He felt his daughter's tears on his shirt. He never knew that Alexis felt that way about his shadowing Beckett. She seemed to be fine since all of this started, even helping him prepare for his undercover nights with Beckett a few times. How was he going to break the news to her that they were now a couple?

Raising her away from his hug, he thumbed her tears away shushing her the way he used to when she would wake up with those nightmares about things that go bump in the night. He looked at her with new eyes. She was a woman now, in love and ready to leave home. But not ready to cut all her ties with her father yet. Deep inside, Alexis was still his little girl and that would never change.

"I'm fine Alexis. Everything is fine. Beckett is fine. Nothing will happen to me. Nothing can happen to me. Beckett takes care of me the same way I take care of her. As for that sniper, we will get him. " For a wordsmith, Castle had no idea what to tell his daughter to assuage her fears. She made sense, a boatload of sense. But he loved Beckett too and he had a responsibility to keep her safe, most specially now that they had reached the next level in their relationship.

"Dad, I know you and Beckett are now a couple."

"How did you...?"

"C'mon dad, Beckett would never let you cuddle up to her that way on the bed if you weren't. Should I start calling her Aunt Kate now?" She forced a smile onto her lips. "I know she makes you happy dad. I know that you live for the thrill that shadowing her gives. Just promise me you will at least stay alive long enough to give me away at my first wedding."

"Make the first wedding count and promise me you'll finish college before you make me a grandfather." They hugged once again with Castle understanding his daughter's fears and Alexis understanding that she would eventually have to turn over responsibility of her father to the woman he had chosen.

xoxoxo

**One Week Later**

The new couple had finally returned from their Hamptons retreat. Riding the wave of love and happiness all the way back during a horrendously traffic riddled trip. They did not seem to mind that the 2 hour trip now took them 5 hours. Castle would not hear of trading seats with Beckett. He drove all the way even though the traffic was giving him leg cramps already. Something which Beckett allowed because their relationship called for her to relinquish control of certain things, when they were not on a case that is.

They used the traffic standstill time to just enjoy each other and peel off layers of their personality for each other. By the time they got back to the penthouse, they knew things about each other that would have Martha and Alexis turning beet red and covering their ears in embarrassment. But that which embarrasses one with the family, usually ends up that thing which your significant other considers sweet, loving, and caring anyway.

xoxoxo

Martha was sitting in her bedroom with a Vodka Martini in one hand and a book of pictures that no one else in her family had ever seen before. It was open to a wedding picture on one side and a family picture in the other. Her eyes were puffy and baggy from lack of sleep. She had lost all sense of peace and security the minute she saw the pictures in Castle's file. It brought back painful memories of a past she had wished to forget but now would have to face.

There was a knock on her door and the familiar voice of her son on the other end. She asked him if Kate was with him, which she was. She wondered if Kate would not mind coming to her room for a little chat. It did not take long for Kate to join her.

"You wanted to see me Martha?" Kate asked when she came into the room. The bed was strewn with pictures of a family, a family that Beckett could only recognize because of the face of the toddler staring at her in the pictures.

"Kate, I need your help." Martha had a sense of urgency in her voice.

"What's wrong?"

"I've done a very bad thing. Something I can never tell Rick. But I need to tell somebody. Somebody I can trust to take care of Rick and keep him safe if he ever needs to be protected." She took another drink from her glass.

"Martha, you're scaring me. What's going on?"

Martha took a dramatic pause before continuing. She looked at Kate and patted the empty space beside her on the bed. She showed Kate the wedding picture and the family in the next page.

"It isn't true that Rick is famously fatherless. I was married to his father." she stopped talking and tried to gather her thoughts. "I have to start at the beginning."

"I'm listening." Kate assured her.

"I met Rick's father when I was a performer in Coney Island. He walked the beat back then and often came to watch my shows after his shift. He was a dashing young man as you can tell." she showed her pictures of the man in uniform.

"His name was Ronald Johnson. Detective Ronnie Johnson." she introduced the man in the picture. " He was the love of my life. I never did forgive myself for what happened to him. I've been trying to atone for it with Rick ever since."

"Martha, you're not making any sense." Kate told her as she took the picture to study it.

"My brother was the problem in the family. He was older than me you know. So I feared his temper and his authority. Our parents had died when we were just teenagers and he had such huge responsibilities fall unto his shoulders. He did the best that he could. But that did not always mean he did the right thing. there were times when I would have to bail him out and I would try to talk sense into him and he would turn around and beat me until I needed to get stitches or something." she showed Kate another picture. A younger version of the picture that was in the folder tucked away in the safe at that very minute.

"Joseph never approved of Ron. Mainly because he did not want to put me in a position of having to ask my husband to bend the law for him or his buddies. But I loved Ron so much that I did not even think of the potential consequences of starting a family with him." she continued her story, her eyes pleading with Kate not to judge her.

"What are you trying to tell me Martha?"

"There was a drug cartel in Washington Heights. My brother was part of the underground characters that founded it. He used to be a henchman of the big boss. He worked his way up the ranks by killing people, coercion, and robbery. He got rich with each law that he broke. The time came when Ron and the law finally caught up with him. The police told me that Joseph did not even blink before putting a bullet between my husbands eyes! The most painful part is that he was never brought to justice for what he did!" Martha broke down and started sobbing.

Kate immediately pulled her into a hug. "It's okay Martha. That was a long time ago. Things have changed now. He can't hurt you anymore. There is nothing that you have to be afraid of."

"You don't understand Kate! He's back! I know he is!"

"Martha! Calm down! Shh..."

"Oh Kate! Oh Kate! You are the only one I can trust with this information. Promise me, promise me that you'll protect Rick. Promise me that my brother will not be able to harm him! Joseph had sent me letter after my husband was buried. He told me that he would not harm my son provided he never became a cop. He advised me to change my name so nobody in law enforcement could ever make the connection. That's why I changed my name and allowed Rick to change his own name later on. But then he met you and...I'm afraid Joseph might put two and two together."

"I promise. I'll take care of your son. I love him." she confessed hoping that it would calm Martha down.

Martha froze upon hearing Kate's words. Things would get more complicated than she thought.

"How strong is your love for my son? Will it withstand anything you might find out about our family's past?"

"He's my one and done Martha." she assured the grieving woman.

"Beckett... Alexis... Mother... I ordered pizza!" They heard Castle holler from downstairs.

"Kate, Rick does not need to know about this. Do you understand?" Martha begged.

"You're secret's safe with me." Kate responded before taking the woman's hand and leading her downstairs with her.

**A/N: How's that for a twist? I hope you guys liked this chapter. The next one will be up really soon. I might return to fluff then :-)**


	9. Protecting Castle

**Chapter 9: Protecting Castle**

**A Few Days Later**

Beckett had been waiting for a chance to talk to Martha again since the night of her drunken confession. Things had changed between her and Castle now. She felt that she was betraying what they had by keeping the information that she now knew about his father a secret from him. It was a weight that she was not willing to bear because she herself would be heartbroken and angered if she ever found out that Castle was keeping such vital information from her. They were more than partners now. Lover's don't keep secrets from each other. She finally got her chance to ask Martha more about what happened when Alexis and Castle left for a father and daughter dinner date. Martha was in the den, sitting on the couch watching a DVD of "Falcon Crest", one of those old TV shows where she was used as a body double for the actual star of the show.

She came in with a bowl of popcorn and sodas for the two of them. Although Beckett knew that she was able enough to go home to her own place, there was just something that kept her feeling so safe, secure, and loved at Castle's loft that she was no longer in a hurry to get away from the place. This place seemed like home to her now. Martha was like her surrogate mother and Alexis... Alexis seemed to have changed towards her a bit ever since she found out about the relationship. That was something that Beckett would work on changing. But on to the more important matter first. Keeping her boyfriend's trust in her intact.

"Martha, I need to know more about Castle's father." she felt that just saying it directly would be the best way to deal with things.

Turning the DVD player off, Martha turned to face her, ashen in the face. She had not expected Beckett to ask her anything more than she had already told her about the past. It was something that pained her deeply to recall and she hoped that after the last time, she would never have to revisit it.

"Kate, I can't tell you anything else. My brother killed Ronnie and that is the end of it. If Rick ever found out that I lied to him..." her eyes pleaded with Beckett not to go to that place of hurt.

"Didn't you want to bring him to justice? I mean, he killed your husband, Castle's father." Beckett wondered what he would do if he ever found out about this unknown relative who cost him his father.

"He is my brother Kate. I just couldn't do it. I decided to let the police do their job. If they got him then I would get justice, if they didn't, I would just have to learn to get over it. He was a lost soul. Nobody could help him. I did not want his blood on my hands or his life on my conscience. I believe in the hand of universal justice. God will strike him down when the time is right. But not by my hand." she got up and went to the kitchen, hoping that she would not follow.

"Martha, Castle deserves to know about his father. You shouldn't keep this from him. I should not keep this from him." Beckett was in a tenacious mood. "I can't keep secrets from him. I shouldn't."

She wasn't angry at this woman, she just needed to understand why Ronald Johnson had to be kept a secret from his son. Even Joseph could not pose any sort of threat to Castle at this point. The man had to be in his 70's already. He could even be dead. What was Martha protecting him from?

"Kate, I love you like a daughter but please stop delving into my past. Into my son's past. It won't do any of us any good. Telling you was a mistake." Martha turned away and headed up the stairs.

Beckett was about to follow her but the front door opened and in walked the father and daughter tandem. Castle with a bouquet of Paper Roses in one hand. After giving her a quick kiss, he went to his room to change. Leaving Alexis and Beckett in awkward silence.

Alexis chose to turn to her Ipad instead of talking to Beckett who was left to clean up the mess that Martha had created in the den. She tried her best not to look at Beckett while she straightened up the couch and turned off the TV, even organizing all the remote controls on the coffee table. But she just needed to let her know what she was feeling. If Beckett was going to be a part of their life, Alexis would need to be on the level with her.

"Beckett, can we talk?" Alexis looked towards her father's door, making sure he wasn't suddenly going to walk in on them.

"Of course Alexis." she stopped what she was doing and sat next to Alexis. "What about?"

Alexis sat up straight and turned so that they were face to face. She was really nervous about what she was about to do. What if Beckett told her dad? But she had to do this. For her father's sake. For their family's sake. Beckett was still an outsider after all. An outsider who posed a threat to their lives.

She cleared her throat as an expectant Beckett looked at her.

"It's about you and my dad." she studied Beckett's face for any sign of trouble. Beckett nodded. She was listening.

"He really loves you you know. He would never leave you. He would put himself in harms way for you." she wasn't really sure how to get her message, her request across without seeming like she was demanding it of Beckett.

"I know Alexis. I would do the same for him. I am done pushing him away." Beckett commented.

Alexis had found her opening.

"Then you know that every time he is with you, he is in danger. He could get hurt or killed. When you have a security detail, he has a detail. We all have a detail. There's that 3XK guy out there who is just waiting for a chance to get to both of you. Then there's the sniper that shot you. What I am asking Beckett is..." she paused to catch her breath. "Would you be willing to sacrifice for my father? For our family? Can you quit being a cop?"

Beckett opened her mouth and then shut it, not really sure how to respond to that. She would have said yes in a heartbeat. But she still had issues tied with law and justice that she had to work out. Things that she needed her badge in order to accomplish.

"I knew it." Alexis was getting teary eyed at Beckett's non-answer. "Forget I said anything." she got up and headed to her room upstairs. "You are self-centered you know that?" she hollered as she disappeared up the steps.

Beckett was left confused. Her new world seemed to be crashing all around her. She heard a door open.

"Beckett? What happened? Why are you crying?" Castle took his place beside her, wrapped her in his arms and rocked her gently while she softly cried.

"Whatever it is, we'll get through it together." he whispered and silenced her with his kiss.

xoxoxo

She lay in bed trying to process everything that had happened during the last few hours. The Alexis situation could easily be resolved by a simple action on her part. But she wasn't willing to give that part of her life up just yet. Not while her sniper and The Dragon were still out there. Then there was Martha and the case of Castle's father. She had this urge to find out what really went down when his father died. Something told her she needed to know all that she could about this Joseph and how he got away with murder.

The clock on her bedside said 11:00 PM. Ryan and Esposito would be at the precinct by now. She picked up her cell phone and hit the speed dial button.

_"Esposito."_

_"It's Beckett. I need you to pull a case file for me. The name is Ronald Johnson. He was a detective with NY back in the day. It's a cold case. Have Lanie bring over the copies when she comes over this Friday." _

Martha did not need to know she was doing this. If she wasn't going to give her all the details, then Beckett was going to do what she did best, detect. They both wanted to protect Castle, but she wasn't willing to protect him by keeping him in the dark. He deserved better than that.

**TBC**

**A/N: Sorry about the delayed update. Real life got in the way the past few days. I know this is a really short chapter but the next few scenes I wrote simply did not fit the title I chose for this chapter. I promise the next one will be longer and more exciting. Surprises coming up :-)**


	10. I Love You

**Chapter 10: I Love You**

**Thursday Morning**

A soft knock on Beckett's door stirred her awake. She rolled over in bed and covered her head with the extra pillow she normally hugged when she slept. Castle waited outside until he was sure that she was still asleep before carefully opening the door and soft pillow footing it into the room. He carried her breakfast tray to the empty side table before settling down next to her.

He just lay in silence as he watched her profile sleep. She looked so peaceful. No trace of the ghosts the hounded her past or anger at what had happened to her visible on her face. Her mouth was crooked up in a seeming half smile as he lowered his face closer to hers. He wanted to memorize every bit of her features, every pore of her skin. He wanted to take in as much of her intoxicating cherry scent as he could. Hell, he wanted to take her right there and then.

"What?" Beckett spoke with a smile. She knew he had entered the room and that he was pussyfooting around trying not to wake her. Okay, she really liked pushing his buttons that way. The shock on his face made her giggle like a school girl.

"I brought your breakfast." He answered when she broke her eyes open. She pulled him down to her by the neck for a quick kiss before sitting up in bed.

Castle liked waking up early to bring her breakfast in bed. It gave them a few extra hours of alone time before Martha and Alexis woke up. They had not shared a bed since they got back from the Hamptons and this was their way of making up for it. Fooling around in between bites of scrambled egg whites for her and S'morelettes for him. No matter what he did, she just could not take the taste of that egg dish. Alexis had warned her once that she could not even swallow it and Beckett agreed after the first taste. All 3 women still wondered how he managed to eat so much of the offensive stuff.

It was hard to believe that they had officially been together for almost 2 weeks now. It seemed like only yesterday that she was still doing her best to push him away and fighting those overwhelming feelings of attraction that bothered her so much. Now, they could barely keep their hands off each other to get through breakfast.

"I'm taking you out to dinner tonight." Castle told her when they finally broke away from their heavy kissing long enough to catch a breath and a bite.

"What's the occasion?" she wondered. The last time they were out as a plus one, they were undercover at a male strip club.

"Does there need to be one before I can take my muse out for a night on the town?" he winked at her as he spoke. His muse. His love. Katherine. Kate Beckett. The woman he was sure he was going to grow old and gray with.

"Not really, but I don't have a thing to wear. All my date clothes are at the apartment." she explained.

Date clothes? No way. He was not just about to take her out wearing clothes that she had allowed Demming and Josh to touch her in. He wanted to erase those men from their love story.

"You don't have to get dressed for a gala event. We're just having dinner at Nobu." he replied taking his wallet out of his back pocket and handing her a platinum card. "Get yourself something pretty."

She pushed the card back at him. "What I am? Your whore?" the irritation was evident in her voice.

"What? No! I... Meredith and Gina..."

"Castle, this is me we are talking about. Me. Kate. You should know me!" the romantic mood was officially gone.

"Sorry." he tucked the card away and tried to put an arm around her while she ate.

"That just made me so mad..."

"It won't happen again."

"Rick, I am not used to it. I will never get used to it. Don't buy me stuff because I said I don't have something. It makes me feel cheap. I won't ever use you the way your ex-wives did." she put down her fork and lay her head on his shoulder.

He was listening and being amazed further by the woman he was holding in his arms. She was truly a cut above any women he ever dated or married. She never asked anything of him, even though he was willing to give her anything she asked of him. His offers of kindness were accepted only if she felt that it would not demean her sense of self worth. Simply amazing.

xoxoxo

Beckett had managed to get out of the house with the aide of Martha to do some clothes shopping for their big night. A quick trip to the Barney's saw her come back with an outfit that was sure to make her beau's night. This was the first time they were stepping out as a couple and they were both going to make sure it became a memorable event.

"Do you think it's too much?" she asked Martha as she tried on the dress in the privacy of the guestroom or rather, Kate's room as Castle insisted on calling it.

"Kate, it's a classic little off the shoulder black dress. It can never be too much." Martha assured her as she rummaged through her jewelry box for accessories to go with the dress. She would have to tell Richard to gift Kate with a few pieces. Just to get her started. If she was going to become a part of the Manhattan circle that her son frequented, she would need to adjust her fashion needs accordingly.

"Yeah. Right." Beckett wasn't really sure if it was the right dress to wear. the saleswoman assured her that the dress was worthy of Nobu though. So maybe that was enough endorsement that she made the right choice? Regardless, it was too late to change her mind now. She had no choice but to go with it. Castle had already been patiently waiting an hour for her to get ready. Their dinner reservation was at 9.

"Kate... the limo's here. he replaced the service phone into the receiver. He had hired them a car for the night and he was very eager to get it started. She had absolutely no idea of the surprises he had in store for her.

He was standing at the foot of the stairs, gazing absentmindedly at the floor as he waited for her to finally come down.

"Let's go Rick." he heard her say. He looked up and completely forgot how to breath. Standing before him at the top of the stairs was the most beautiful woman in the world..The dress perfectly framed her svelte figure. He hair was simply styled with a curling iron and her lips, the color just made him want to make contact with it already. She seemed to be floating down towards him and all he could do was stare with an open mouth.

"Rick!" he snapped out of it when he felt her nudge him in the arm.

"Ladies first." he held her coat for her as she put it on before they left the room.

xoxoxo

They had feasted on Kumamoto Oysters, Black Cod with Miso, and were halfway through their squid pasta when a familiar woman walked up to their table for a quick chat.

"Rick Castle." Gina smiled at him as she approached their table. Seeing who the woman with him was made her smile with mischief. "I knew it would happen to the two of you eventually." she winked at Kate.

"What? How did you know?" Kate stammered. Aside from Martha and Alexis, nobody really knew that they were an official couple already.

"C'mon, I can see it in your eyes, his actions. I've been watching you two most of the night." there was no bitterness in her voice. Her breakup with Castle was not exactly amicable. He had ditched her during a cellphone conversation that Beckett had accidentally overheard.

"Gina..." Castle began.

"It's okay. I'm here with somebody special myself." she pointed to an important looking man a number of tables away from them. "Congratulations you two."

"Thank you." Kate automatically responded. She was feeling very awkward but could do nothing about Gina's intrusion into their night. "So, this is what it feels like when the current girlfriend meets the ex-wife." she thought to herself.

xoxoxo

The limo seemed to be taking the scenic route on their way home. Kate was glad that the car was going slow. She just wanted to stay exactly where she was at that time, lying her head down on Rick's lap, his fingers slowly running through her hair while he ran through possible new Nikki Heat plot lines with her. His voice was hypnotic. She was feeling light and warm inside. Loving every minute that their skins were touching. Not wanting to go home because they would have to stay apart for the night. Sharing a bed was not an option because Kate wanted to respect the presence of Castle's family in the house. Her rights as the girlfriend were not clearly established yet and until it was, this would be their arrangement. She dozed off content and happy.

He kissed her cheek lightly and repeatedly as the limo pulled into the hotel driveway. She slowly opened her eyes and adjusted to the surroundings. She sat up and straightened herself up, fully expecting the doorman of Castle's loft to open the door any minute.

"Where are we?" she asked when the door opened to one of the most amazing hotel entrances she had ever seen.

"The Ritz-Carlton. I booked us an Executive Suite for the night." he whispered as he helped her out of the car. He pulled her close to his own hips as they walked in.

xoxoxo

In typical Richard Castle fashion, the room that he booked had too much of everything. It had a spectacular view of the Statue of Liberty, a bedroom and a living room, a telescope that looked out into the harbor, an excessive number of flat screen TV's, and other amenities that just screamed "I've got money to burn!" at Beckett. She could not help but feel a bit out of place in this world of his. She was not going to complain however. This was his world, she would just have to find her comfortable place in it. After all, Castle never complained about the shortcomings of her own world.

He was sitting in the living room now, pretending to watch the news. She could tell that he was nervous. So was she. This was the first time that they would be spending the night together in a place other than his as a couple. They both knew that something had to happen. The last time something happened was the night before they returned from the Hamptons.

Marlowe, the concierge was one of the best men on the job. He had managed to get Castle the blue Tiffany box that he had just taken out of the safe on such short notice. The man had only a matter of hours to get the item after all. Tiffany's was already closed when he asked Marlowe to do him the favor. He had to correct Marlowe at the time, the item did not really signify anything specific.

She had finally had her fill of the night harbor view through the telescope and had joined him in the living room for a nightcap. He stuffed the box under the seat cushion when she surprised him. He really wanted to see her reaction to his gift but he had to set the mood first.

He walked over to the bar and poured some drinks. He handed her one before settling in beside her. She automatically leaned into him and relaxed. Taking small sips of the wine as needed. He picked up the remote control and turned on the piped in music. Setting the romantic tone that he was looking for.

"Kate, are you happy with me?" He asked like a little boy afraid of losing his toy.

"Very Rick. I can't be any happier. My life is perfect with you. Are you happy with me? " she looked up at him and traced his jawline softly wondering where this was all leading.

He took a deep breath and reached between the seat cushions, hoping she would not notice since he had stuffed the box in the back of the couch.

"Any happier and I would burst. My life with you in it, it's just paradise. Specially since I never thought I could ever have you. What with Demming then Josh..." she placed her index finger on his lips and shushed him.

"They are all in the past. I am all yours. A one writer woman." she stopped herself from saying "You are my one and done". It was just too soon for that. "Nobody can come between us anymore. We won't let them." She kissed him on the cheek, trying to erase any insecurities from his thoughts.

He wasn't sure about what else he could say to her. He produced the box and held it out to her. "For you."

She recognized the box immediately. Was he doing what she thought he was doing? God, she hoped not. She wasn't ready for that step yet. She was barely getting her footing in the relationship. She began to unwrap the bow from the box as he spoke.

"I'm not proposing anything solid here." he began as she cracked the box open. "It isn't that kind of ring." Was he a mind reader?

In the middle of the velvety soft pillow ring box sat a Tiffany Legacy Collection Tanzanite ring. The legacy cut Tanzanite gem was surrounded by brilliant diamonds on a platinum ring. Kate's mouth hung open at the sight of the jewelry. She knew it was too expensive. There was no way she was going to accept such an expensive gift from a man who may or may not become her "one and done".

Rick seemed to have guessed what she was thinking. He stammered out an explanation. "I just want you to have something from me. Something special. Something that will remind you of me when you look at it. Always." he emphasized the last word, hoping that she would understand what he was trying to say.

She sighed and looked at him straight in the eyes. He really did not have to do this. She did not want it nor need it. But then again, it was really sweet of him. That was perhaps what she loved the most about him. That he often went out of his way to please her. Trying to guess at what would make her happy all the time. This ring, it made her happy. It was something that would always connect her thoughts to him even when they were apart. It was the first thing he ever bought for her. It was special, just like he was to her. Now she was embarrassed that she did not have anything for him. Or maybe she did?

"This is a wonderful gift. It's something I will value. Always." she too emphasized the last word. but then she continued. " I love you Rick, even if you don't buy me expensive things. All I need is you."

Rick was taken aback by what she had said. She had never used those words in front of him before. " What did you say?"

"I said - I love you." Kate lowered her voice. She too was surprised by what she had just said. Then she repeated it. "I love you Richard Castle." in a louder voice.

He smiled at her while taking the ring out of the box. She had just given her the best gift of all time. Neither Meredith nor Gina had ever said those words to him while reiterating that what they loved was him and not his money. They usually said it while they were maxing out his credit cards on shopping sprees instead. He slipped the ring onto Kate's right ring finger as their lips met once again. This time it was Kate who broke away from the kiss.

"We need to go to bed Rick. The things I want to do with you, this couch would be in the way." her voice was beginning to get heavy with lust as she whispered into his ear.

"I'm on it." he responded, not breaking their kiss as he swept her into his arms and off to the bed.

It was the first night that they had shared such a tender act of love. So different from when they first did it at the Hamptons. This time, they moved like an elegant ballet and enjoyed their dance into the wee hours of the morning. The sun was already cracking into their bedroom window before they finally wore themselves out enough to fall asleep.

**TBC**

**A/N: This just felt like the logical progression of their relationship to me. I know it's mushy :-) I guess it is the romantic in me. Now what happens when Lanie sees that rock on her finger? Stay tuned for more ;-)**


	11. Accidental Revelation

**Chapter 11: Accidental Revelation**

She woke up pressed against his chest. Her head resting on the manly pillow as his arms protectively held her close. His breathing was steady and relaxed. She was almost afraid to move and wake him. Glancing at the clock on the table, she noted the time. Brunch would be the order of the day. Very carefully, she worked to unwind herself from their tangled bodies. He flinched at the sudden loss of contact with her but did not wake.

"Kate." he murmured in his sleep as he unconsciously crossed his arms, not realizing she was no longer with him.

She kissed him lightly on the lips to silence him. After what they did the night before, he had earned the right to sleep till noon. Beckett had never been so sexually satisfied in her life. That was not to say that Sorensen, Demming, or Davidson were lacking as bed mates. It's just that she just seemed to be going through the motions with them. What she did with those men lacked the personal connection that she had with Rick Castle. It was something she had never experienced before. It was something she had been learning about from their first night as lovers in the Hamptons. Then she felt unsure of her actions and insecure. But he proved to be a patient teacher and giving lover. Maybe it was the wine that got them drunk, or perhaps it was the romantic setting of the room, probably the ring he gave her? Something just clicked for them last night, last night was magic. Last night, Kate Beckett knew what is was like not just to have mind blowing sex, but to actually be making soft, gentle, caring love with her partner, with her soul-mate.

Making her way to the next room, she ordered breakfast for the two of them and headed to the shower to freshen up. She was already in the hotel robe by the time their food arrived. Time for Castle to wake up. Repositioning herself in his arms, she slowly kissed the parts of his body that she could reach while coaxing him to his senses.

He slowly stirred and came to. "Good morning." he stretched out his arms causing Beckett to roll to the side of the bed.

"Time for brunch sleepy head." she smiled at him as pulled her back into his arms.

"In a few. I just want to lie here with you first." he relaxed as she lay her head back on his chest. "You smell like fresh cherries."

"I just took a shower." she confessed while she drew lazy lines around his pecs.

They lay in silence for a few moments before he spoke again.

"Who would have said 3 years ago that our magnets would finally flip and connect huh?" he asked her, still unable to believe that they were finally together.

"Actually, it's more like 7 years ago for me." she sighed contentedly as he held her.

"7 years? When did..."

"It was after my mother's murder. I started reading your books and got addicted to the stories. Your books helped me work through my mother's murder. I was learning how to become a cop at the academy, and I was learning to think like a killer from you. I survived the darkest days of my life because you were there for me in a way. I obsessed over your books so much that I stood in line that time that you had a book signing at Barnes and Nobles." she looked up at him to see his reaction. "You signed a copy of "In A Hail Of Bullets" for me." This was a part of her life that she swore Castle would never know about. She even told Sorensen, her ex-boyfriend that she would make sure Castle never knew about it. But that seemed moot and academic at this point.

"I don't remember..."

"It was a very long line. I waited over an hour to get to you. When I did, you were so tired I guess that you did not even bother to look up. You just asked for my name and signed it with a generic greeting."

He lifted her face towards his. "You mean I could have met you long before and I passed on it? It's official, I am an idiot." he joked. "Remind me to sign another copy for you when we get home." he kissed her softly.

Their tender moment was disturbed by the rumbling sound that suddenly came out of his tummy. They shared a laugh as they got out of bed and made their way to the silent butler filled with breakfast goodies.

xoxoxo

"Alexis, your father will be walking through that door any minute. You know how it get's when he spends time with Beckett." Martha was trying to convince Alexis to have some Chicken Risotto with her for lunch.

The young woman had spent a sleepless night waiting for her father and Beckett to do the walk of shame. But the sun had come and it seems it would again be gone without the pair making an appearance. He had not answered any of her text messages and all her calls were going to his voice mail. Alexis was in a near state of panic and was seriously considering calling Det. Ryan and having them searched for.

"Grams, they could be hurt. It's not like dad to be this irresponsible." she reasoned while she sat at the other side of the breakfast nook, watching her grandmother eat.

"Your father is a grown man, Beckett is a highly trained police officer. Don't worry yourself over nothing." she took a sip of wine as her granddaughter checked her cellphone once again.

"She is recovering from a bullet wound! Somebody tried to kill her! Since she lived, I am sure whoever it is will try to do it again and again until he succeeds. I don't want dad to be with her when that happens." Alexis' Castle imagination went into overdrive at the possible worst case scenarios the pair could be currently involved in.

"Alexis, you have obviously inherited your father's gift for jumping to conclusions. Now consider this, we know they went out on one of the few real dates either of them have had in a very long time. Last night was the first time they went out into the city as a couple. Everything is new to them. They need the time together without the distractions we cause. They are fine. Don't you think that if they were in any real trouble, somebody from the 12th would have called us already?"

"But grams!"

"Alexis, he is still your father. Do not try to run his life for him. Has he ever tried to tell you what to do with Ashley? Has he ever been a bad father? Has Beckett shown any reason for you not to trust that she won't protect him if they are caught in a situation? Let them be." Martha held up a hand to her granddaughter to signify that the talk was over. "Besides, you are leaving in January, you have made your choice of a life without your father. Let him find his own happiness without you. God knows he will need it after you leave."

The laughter of the couple entering the loft prevented an all out argument from breaking out between the grandmother and granddaughter.

"Finally! the new couple doing the walk of shame I see..." Martha joked as the couple came into view.

"Good afternoon Mother, Alexis." Castle nodded towards the family while he cuddled with Beckett where they stood.

"Dad! You couldn't have called?" Alexis' irritation was evident in the tone of her voice.

"I'm sorry honey, we got caught up and lost track." Castle replied as Beckett broke free and headed to the kitchen for a drink.

"I was worried dad. You know how I feel about you going around with Beckett these days. Don't you ever do that again! Both of you could have been killed! She can get you killed dad!"

"Alexis Castle! I will not have you talking to me that way. Do not forget your place in this house. I am the parent, you are the daughter. I have shown you leniency and freedom all these years. But I think you are over-doing it. You will apologize to Kate immediately." he reprimanded his daughter after seeing Kate turn ashen and look guilty upon hearing the verbal rampage.

Alexis stared at her father. He had never used such a harsh tone on her before. Neither had he ever lectured her and demanded that she apologize to any of his girlfriends in the past. If this was going to be their new family dynamic, she did not like it one bit.

"I'm going to stay over at Tina's tonight." she left in disgust.

"Alexis..." Beckett tried to stop her at the foot of the stairs. The three of them needed to talk and sort things out.

"Not now Beckett."

Castle walked over to Becket and hugged her from behind. "Don't let her get to you." he kissed her hair to reassure her that everything was going to work out for them. Beckett wasn't so sure.

xoxoxo

Lanie and the rest of the "family" arrived for their weekly get together bearing gifts of beer and pizza for the boys, and rented romantic comedy films for the girls to watch in Beckett's room. But before they could retreat to their specific areas, they got together for cocktails in the living room.

Ryan, Esposito, and Lanie had been nudging each other since they arrived, noticing almost immediately that something had changed between Beckett and Castle since they were last there. Castle seemed even more attentive of her now and Beckett no longer seemed annoyed by it. In fact, she seemed to revel in it. The brush of their hands when they accidentally touched, the eye contact when one walked away from the other, something was definitely up. Beckett, as Lanie had noticed but not voiced out, was glowing. Glowing...

Lanie and Beckett were in the kitchen getting the game card snacks for the guys ready before they headed up for their movie marathon and sleep-over. Martha had retired early to her room, disappointed and embarrassed by the scene that Alexis had made earlier.

"Girl, what's going on between you and hot stuff over there?" Lanie asked while Beckett got the microwave popcorn going.

"What? Nothing. What makes you think that?" Beckett tucker her stray hair behind her ear with her right hand, trying to buy herself some time before actually having to answer Lanie. Natalie Rhodes was right, she did use it as a delaying tactic.

"You're glowing Missy. So something must be... Oh, My God!" Lanie grabbed her friend's hand to get a better look at the ring. "That is one eye popping bauble you are wearing there. And," Lanie held the hand up to the light. "those diamonds are real! How did you... That is at least 6 carats you have got tucked in there... Hold on... The looks, the glow... You're together now aren't you?" she was getting excited. Her gut told her she was about to get an admission of truth.

"Lanie..."

"Just spill it Beckett. we've got a pool going at the office that I am going to win big time."

"Castle and I..."

Lanie grabbed her by the hand and ran into the game area with her. Beckett did not have to openly admit the obvious to her.

"Richard Castle! You did this!" the shoved Beckett's hand wearing the ring into his face.

"Ummm... Lanie..." Castle looked at Beckett, hoping to see some sort of clue as to what to do in her eyes. She had nothing.

It had not occurred to either of them that they would need to tell their precinct family about their relationship just yet. They both thought they had at least another month with which to enjoy the privacy of their relationship before having to tell Lanie and the others. Then again, everybody at the precinct already thought they had a relationship anyway. So any admission was just some sort of formality for those around them.

"Yo bro! How long have you been holding out on us?" Esposito smacked him on the back in a playful manner.

"What's going on?" Ryan asked. As usual, he was clueless and oblivious to what was right under his nose.

Cornered and left without any more excuses, Beckett did the only logical thing in the presence of their closest friends, she bent down and pulled Castle's head up for a passionate kiss.

"It's been 2 weeks today." she admitted after.

A flurry of questions and jokes followed.

"2 weeks, that's the whipped-anniversary." Esposito joked. Lanie threw him a glaring look. "Joking. Just joking babe."

"Remind me to show you what whipped actually means tomorrow night." she teased her boyfriend.

"Oh Castle's been whipped long before today." Ryan added.

"Uhm...hmm. We all knew it was coming. Just thought you'd break it to us formally instead."

"Sorry," Castle said "It happened at the Hamptons. When Beckett ended up back at the hospital.."

"What? What happened? And you did not call, text, or twitter any of us?" Lanie smacked Castle on the upside of his head.

Beckett instinctively massaged the area and held his head closer to her.

"Wow! Never seen that protective side before." Lanie teased.

"I guess things have changed now." Beckett beamed at them. "The only one with permission to smack him on any body part right now, is me." she winked at her friend in jest.

"Hey!" Castle turned his head to Beckett.

"What?" she popped her eyes at him to let him know it was just a joke.

"You are both forgiven. Just make sure to keep us in the loop next time. After all, we are family." Lanie looked at the ring once again and sighed.

"What? I got you a charm bracelet for Valentine's." Esposito sounded offended.

"Yeah, and my 5 year old niece called me to say she wanted her bracelet back."

"Bro... nice way to make me look bad."

Castle was about to say something in his defense when Lanie cut in.

"At least he knows how to treat a lady. "she waved her ring-less finger in front of Esposito. "Do you see anything on this finger? What? You too cheap for Mossanite?" They all knew Lanie was kidding but she just had to take a swipe at her boyfriend's lack of knowledge when it came to the kind of jewelry women really wanted.

"Ey! I earn a cop's salary." he defended.

"I know sweetie. I was just messing with you." Lanie kissed her guy on the cheek to soothe his obviously bruised ego. "You know I love you no matter what."

I think Lanie and iI should get to our movies before things get ugly." Becket lovingly squeezed Castle on the shoulder before leading Lanie out.

**TBC**

**A/N: The story will take a serious turn from this point. It's going to lead to a big decision on Beckett's part and the eventual end of the story. Castle will be making some tough decisions as well. I apologize if the story has dragged on too long :-)**


	12. Decision Points

**Chapter 12: Decision Points**

Beckett sat at the desk reading the Ronald Johnson case file. The soft glow of the study lamp lit up the copies of the documents that Esposito had made for her. Ron Johnson was the kind of cop that New York needed more of. He was an exemplary detective who was known for creating air tight cases and putting his life on the line whenever his duty called for it. He was a cop's cop so to speak. Ron Johnson was married to Margaret Egbert according to the files. They had a son, Alexander Ronald who was left fatherless before he was even old enough to create a memory of the man who helped give him life. Alexander Ronald, so that was Richard Castle's original name. A name that he never knew about.

She was about to get to the hard part. The police report about the shootout that cost the man his life. Johnson was a detective in the robbery squad at the time of his death. The report explained that he was working on busting up a B&E ring in Washington Heights at the time of his death. He had managed to infiltrate the group and worked under cover for 6 months before his cover was blown. There was no reference to Johnson being killed by his brother in law. It seemed to Beckett that Martha was right, he had managed to keep his association from Joseph a secret from the force. But there was a detailed report from eye witnesses, gang members who were too afraid to help him, regarding the execution type killing of the man. His killer Joseph Egbert, had escaped to Canada at the time and had not been seen since. There were rumors though, that he had come back to the U.S. a decade after the murder and regrouped, expanding his mob rule to drugs and assassinations on leaders of rival groups. All speculation at this point. The case was so old that Egbert might even already be dead.

Lanie stirred in bed, she ended up facing the study light. The beam broke through her slumber and woke her. "Katie? What time is it? Why are you still awake?"

"I'm reading through the case file. Thanks for bringing it over by the way." she continued to scan the documents in the folder.

"What's so special about that case Kate? It's as moldy as penicillin." Lanie stretched out in bed and swung her legs over so that she was sitting while they talked.

She wasn't sure if Lanie should be privy to the information that she had. How would finding out about Castle's past affect the way their friends saw and treated him? But this was her best friend, her trusted adviser. Maybe it was worth the risk.

"Lanie, what I am about to tell you cannot leave this room. Not even Castle knows that I have this file and I am not sure how he would react if he found out I was snooping around in his family's past."

Lanie's face took a serious turn. What was going on? What was Beckett up to? What was so secret about Castle's past? She nodded and motioned for Beckett to continue.

"This is the case file for Ronald Johnson. Castle's father. Don't ask me how I found out or how I know he is the father. That is not important. His father was murdered. Castle never knew. All this time he thought his mother was some flippant woman who had sex ala carte and just did not care about who fathered him."

"Okay." Lanie sat silently for a moment, trying to imbibe all of the information that was thrown her way. "What do you plan to do with that information?"

'I don't know." Beckett looked out the glass window. "He never told me I could not delve into his past. But then again, he never knew that he had a past. He has to know about his father. But I don't think it should come from me."

Lanie could see the distress on her friend's face. She was now in a similar situation to Castle a few years ago, when he discovered new information about her mother's case and came to her with it. From what Lanie knew of the man however, she knew that unlike Beckett, he would not chew her head off for this. He was the kind of man who would appreciate any act of kindness and love from anybody in his circle. More so if it came from the woman he loved.

"You have to tell him honey." she told Beckett silently. "He has the right to know. If nobody else will tell him, then you have to do it." 

"But Lanie..."

"You said so yourself, he has some misconceptions about his mother. Just because she can't bring herself to tell him the truth doesn't mean that he should be kept in the dark forever about his past." She pretty much guessed what Beckett could not tell her.

Beckett rested her chin on her hand. Talk about a tough decision. She thought back and wondered if he felt the same sick way she was now feeling when he first learned all that new information about her mother's murder.

xoxoxo

The two women were now dressed in their running gear. Kate was now well enough to undergo light physical activities like a short jog around the area. There was a jogging park nearby that she had been dying to try since Castle told her about it, Lanie was going to join her that morning to make sure that she did not overdo it.

"Rick, we're heading out for a quick jog. Can I borrow your keys?" she had gone into his room and whispered into his ear while lightly nudging him.

"Kate? Keys? Oh right. I had a set made for you the other day, grab it from the key holder in the hall. It's got a key chain with your name on it."

"You had a set made for me? Rick?"

"Yeah. Now let me go back to sleep." he mumbled.

"Rick... Rick... why'd you do that?"

"Why not? You... live...protect you..." his voice trailed off as he slumbered on.

xoxoxo

"Let's go." Beckett froze at the hallway key holder when she saw her personal set of keys. She shook the feeling of apprehension off and grabbed the keys, practically running out the door.

Running seemed to take the edge off for her. The cold wind filling her lungs and added color to her face. It helped her concentrate. Things were going too fast for her and Castle. She needed to take control and slow things down. He got her a set of keys! Was he really expecting her to move in totally? She had never thought of staying at Casa Castle permanently. She still needed her space. There was also the little matter of Alexis being against her at the moment. Nothing about their current situation made her feel confident about moving in with him.

"It was sweet of him to do that you know." Lanie reminded her when they had stopped to take their pulse rates between sprints. "Most people get a drawer, he gave you a whole room."

"Don't think I don't appreciate his actions. I just think we should slow down. Giving me the keys to his kingdom, it just seems too soon."

"Too soon? The two of you have been dancing around this for 3 years now. It doesn't take this long to bake a cake." Lanie started on a brisk walk with Beckett on her heels. "Take a risk Kate. You know he's proven his worth. You know you want this as badly as he does."

At that very moment a thought occurred to Beckett. A thought that she knew would work and would come as a complete surprise to Richard Castle. Indeed, she badly wanted this relationship to work. This would be here one and done.

xoxoxo

It was a quiet lunch with her man since Lanie had left to spend the rest of the day with Esposito after breakfast. The information about his father had been weighing her down all morning and Castle was beginning to notice.

"Are you okay?" He asked when she seemed to get lost in thought over her creme brulee dessert. It was never good when Beckett got all quiet on him. It was either she was analyzing a case file, which could not be the case this time, or, he had done something wrong and she was choosing to ignore him until she figured out what to do with him.

The expression on her face when she looked at him reminded her of the many times that she seemed to have wanted to tell him something important and then held back for one reason or another. What was she hiding from him this time? Why did she still keep secrets from him? Weren't they diving into everything together from that point on?

"So... I was thinking... did you ever wonder about your dad?" she thought it best to just get it out there. She had to know what to do. But she would let him dictate how it would be done.

He swallowed hard upon hearing that. She had caught him off-guard. Truth be told, he never thought that she was interested in that part of his past. She had once told Esposito that he was famously fatherless and never brought it up again. What would make her bring it up now?

"I used to. Up until I was 18 I used to imagine that he would just show up at our doorstep one day with a can of whipped cream. Telling me that I was the heir to his creamy fortune." he was making light of a situation that he realized too late Beckett was serious about. "What's this about Kate?"

She took a deep breath before busying herself with making their coffee from the coffee pot that was on the dining table. "It's just that you never talk about it, that's all. " Why couldn't she bring herself to tell him?

"Well, do you want to talk about it?"

"Only if you do." she handed him the cup of steaming hot coffee.

"Well, I don't really think of him as that important. I mean, I've been walking this earth for how many decades now and he never bothered to try and find me. I think I turned out just fine don't you think?" he took her hand and kissed it.

She couldn't tell him. Not like this. Kate realized how much hurt he actually had at the thought that there was this man who abandoned him and his mother. He was angry in his own gentle way. She would have to ease him into it. Get him interested in finding out about his father. His father was an honorable man who deserved to be remembered by his son in high regard. Why did Martha do this to her only child? Why did it seem like the past women in his life always broke him, his mother included? For now, this was a family secret that would be her cross to bear. It pained her so much to know that they were two wounded souls, looking for somebody to help them heal. She quietly hoped that they could help each other get over the horrors of their past.

xoxoxo

Ashley was not sure about how to diffuse the emotions that seemed to be boiling over within Alexis. She had been angry ever since he picked her up from Tina's and was refusing to go home. They had already spent a great deal of the day simply wandering around the mall. They saw a movie, had ice cream, played video games... he had done everything he could think of to mellow her off but it seemed like nothing he did was working.

"My dad doesn't need me anymore!" she fumed while they sat in the promenade area just to talk. Ashley was intent on taking her home before 6:00 p.m. but she was not cooperating. "I don't want to go home! I have no place there!"

"Alexis! Get a grip and listen to yourself!" he was really exasperated with her and seriously wanted to grab her and shake some sense into her. She had been acting like a brat ever since Beckett got shot and it had more than gotten on his nerves. He was frayed and literally holding on to his senses before he did or said something he would regret.

"What the hay Ashley! You're supposed to be on my side!"

"I am! But don't you see what you are doing? You are pushing your dad away and he hasn't done anything to you to deserve it! It isn't his fault he fell in love! You have been after him for years to find someone special and when he finally does you go all ballistic on him! You're not making any sense Alexis!" he found himself doing a face wipe. "He is a full grown man. An adult, fully capable of taking care of himself and defending his actions. You have no right to dictate how your dad should live his life. It is okay to have fears. You told him about it. He knows about it. He will have to deal with it. You cannot impose your will on your father. Just like he does not impose his will upon you. Do you understand what I am trying to tell you?"

He saw her shake at his outburst. He had not meant to blow up at her that way. But after 2 months of hearing nothing but her father did this and Beckett did that and he could get killed and on and on and on... all men had their limits and he had just reached his.

"I am taking you home, you are going to sit down and talk to you father, get this mess sorted out and most importantly, you will apologize to Beckett for being an ass. Do you understand? If you don't or cannot do this, consider us done! I have had it with you!"

xoxoxo

Alexis crept into the loft hoping to avoid her dad and Beckett while she tried to sort things out in her mind. Ashley may have been on to something during his rant. Maybe she was acting like a spoiled brat. She had been the only woman in her father's life for the past 18 years and seeing him shower another woman with love and care, and to see that woman love him back, it made her jealous. Jealous. She had finally admitted it to herself. She was protective of her father because he was the only parent she had ever known. Her mother was one loose screw away from being committed and her dad was the only constant person in her life. The one person whom she knew she could always count on. That never changed when he was in relationships. So why would it change now?

"Alexis? Honey? Is that you?" she heard her father's voice coming from the den. He sounded so happy. There was a smile in his voice. A smile that had not been there in a very long time.

Maybe she was wrong. Maybe Beckett would be good for her father. If they truly loved each other they would protect each other no matter what. Maybe she did not have to take care of him anymore. She was free to live without worry, he was Beckett's responsibility now.

The more Alexis spoke to herself, the more she started to believe in what she was thinking. She believed in it so much that by the time she walked into the den, she had a smile on her face and, seeing the couple cuddled together with an IPad between them in the middle of the couch, she took the next available space next to her dad and tried to give both of them a group hug.

"Wow! Woah! Careful, Beckett's surgery. Ow!" he felt Beckett pinch him. He glanced at her and saw her giving him the "Shut up Rick" look.

"Something changed since yesterday." Beckett tried to hug back with one arm since her other arm was pinned under Castle's own arm.

"I love you both very, very much." Alexis said after releasing them. "I'm sorry I said all those awful things to you Beckett. Or should I call you Kate now?"

"Call me whatever you want Alexis. It's just a name." Beckett scooted over and made some space between her and Castle for Alexis to slip into.

"Listen Alexis, I want you to know... I'm not here to mother you. You are too old to have a mother and I am too young to have a step-daughter. I'm not here to steal your dad away either. You will always be his daughter and he will always be there for you. And I will always be here for you too. So I was thinking, just to define our roles here, I'll be your older sister okay? Or maybe that cool older friend you can run to anytime you need help? Just don't call me to bail you out of jail." she laughed a bit at the last part.

"Bail? Who said anything about bail?" Castle wasn't sure what his part supposed to be in this discussion.

"Oh dad! No, no bail. Friends." Alexis addressed Beckett and smiled. "Just so you know, I don't expect you to change because of your relationship with my dad. But promise me you'll always have his back. You know what a kid he can be sometimes."

"He is the biggest kid I know!" Beckett and Alexis started picking on Castle, leaving him with a dazed and confused look on his face. Girl speak was always lost on him.

Things would work out just fine for all of them. She would have to remember to thank Ashley for getting tough on her when he called.

xoxoxo

Beckett had been toying with the idea of moving back to her place for a couple of days now. Even Lanie assured her that she was well enough to go back to her normal routine although she would miss spending time with her at the Castle loft. She needed to get back to her normal routine if she was to prepare to go back to work. She figured that the next day would be as good a time as any to get started. It was going to hurt Castle like a band aid suddenly peeled off the skin but there was no gentle way of doing it.

Castle knocked on her door for their nightly good night ritual. He was surprised to see Beckett packing her things. "What's going on? Where are you going?"

"It's been two months Castle, I need to get home and fix things up before I report to the precinct." she did her best to not look at him. She knew her resolve would weaken if she looked into those puppy blue eyes of his. "I was thinking of going back to my place in the morning."

"You don't need to go Kate, you know that." he was blindsided and starting to get angry. How could he protect her if she left? How could she make a decision like that without consulting him. "Why didn't you tell me you were planning this?"

"Castle, don't make this any more difficult than it already is ok? We both knew this was a temporary set up."

"Kate!"

"Castle! Rick! Baby..." she softened with each utterance of his name. "This isn't a negotiation. We both knew the time would come." She walked over to him and kissed him long and deep. Letting him know that they were not arguing, begging him to understand why she needed to move out.

He looked into her eyes as they parted. A look of understanding slowly registering on his face. He picked up an aqua blue sweater from the bed and folded it, putting it back in the drawer. "Well, don't take all of your stuff with you."

She smiled and picked up her set of keys to the loft from the dresser drawer top. Stuffing it into her purse pocket. "I can't leave these. By the way, thanks for the keys."

**TBC**

**A/N: The next chapter is going to be the last. I feel that I have taken the story full circle and the next logical step is about to be taken. It will show a definite growth and maturity between the two characters and show the extent that each will go to in order to make sure that their relationship is constantly on solid, unshakable ground. Also, with all the spoilers coming out about the next season, I am starting to get muddled up and I fear it will affect the story I am trying to tell. So I might as well end it at the right place and time for our DD :-)**


	13. A New Beginning

**Chapter 13: A New Beginning**

Beckett gave in to Castle's wish that she sleep in his bed on her last night at the penthouse. But she did not really give in totally to sleep. She was waiting for him to fall deeply into slumber and, after being sure that he was not going to wake, removed his arms that held her in a hug so that she could stand up.

She tip-toed out of the room and made her way up the stairs to Alexis' room. Knocking lightly on the door, she softly called out to the obviously sleeping young lady on the other end of the door.

"Come in." she heard the sleepy voice reply.

Alexis was wiping the sleep from her eyes and sitting up in bed when Beckett slipped in.

"Is something wrong?"

"No. Nothing's wrong. I was wondering if you could help me do something tomorrow." Beckett replied.

"That couldn't wait till morning?"

"No. Your dad can't know we are doing this."

Alexis crunched her brows together. "What are you up to Beckett?"

xoxoxo

Her apartment looked just as she had left it on the day she left to go to Capt. Montgomery's funeral with the exception of the dust build up on the furniture and some cobwebs on the corners of the walls. Paying in advance of 6 months was truly a blessing this time around. She definitely had a date with the vaccum cleaner and dust cloth, but for now, she needed to get her stuff unpacked and her laundry started.

"Beckett... it's freezing." Castle had walked up behind her carrying her bags. He insisted on being the perfect gentleman and accompanying her back to her place.

Little did she know that he was being totally paranoid underneath his cool exterior. His eyes darting all over the place, fearing another gunshot ringing through the air. Ready to tackle her to the ground just in case. He only relaxed a bit after they had taken the stairs up to her apartment and the door locked safely behind them.

"Sorry. You can put those down anywhere Castle." she headed over to the heater to turn it up. Lanie had turned down the heat per her instructions the day that the decision that she was going home to Castle's house was made.

He put the bags down near her bedroom door and then walked over to her blinds covered windows. He slowly parted the blinds and peeked across the street, scanning the crowd, trying to figure out if any of those people posed a threat to Beckett. He hated that she chose to go back to this apartment. She was vulnerable here. It was not a guarded building, anybody could just walk in and up to her place. But she would not hear of moving in with him and he was not going to press her on it. If there was one thing he had learned about Kate Beckett, it was that she did things in her own time and in her own way. In the meantime, he would have to find a way to stop being paranoid and acting all too protective around her.

"I'm making coffee." he heard her say from the kitchen. He followed and wrapped his arms around her waist from behind while she prepared the coffee-maker.

"Ricky.." she did not protest when he kissed the crook of her neck. Instead, she finished what she was doing, turned and hugged him tightly. His unshaven face scratched against her cheek, giving her a ticklish feeling that just felt so heavenly to her. Things would have escalated further had she not glanced accidentally at her watch.

"Rick... We have to stop." she broke away from him to end the mood. She needed to get him out of the apartment soon. "You have to go." she instructed.

"What? But I just got here!" he protested.

"Do you see all the cleaning I have to do?" she lied. "I won't get anything done if you keep distracting me." she walked out to the hall closet and wheeled out the vaccum cleaner.

"I'll help." he volunteered.

"Castle...Go, now. I'll see you tonight." She started up the vaccum and got to work.

"Beckett..." seeing that she was choosing to ignore him already left him with no other option. He made his way to the door.

"Castle." she called out as he passed her.

He turned to her and got swept up in her kiss. She ran her fingers through his hair and messed it up a bit.

"That should last you till tonight." she smiled at him.

He beamed and walked out of the apartment with an extra light feeling warming his body.

xoxoxo

"Grams, we need to move. Dad can't find out what we are doing." Alexis had enlisted the help of Martha in getting Beckett's plan into action.

"I don't see what all the secrecy is about my dear. Your father would be more than happy..." Martha took another sip of wine as she held the small suitcase open for her grand daughter.

"Grams... I think this is a very lovely thing she is doing. It shows a lot of growth in their relationship don't you think?" she stuffed what looked like her father's long sleeved shirt into the bag.

"Back in the day, we just went with the flow. Planning was not required. There was no fun in that." Martha complained.

"Grams..."Alexis protested.

"I know... I know..." Martha put the wine glass down and went into his private bath. "I'll get the other things together."

xoxoxo

Castle was sitting at the Black Pawn Publishing waiting room before his meeting with his book editor started. He had arrived earlier than expected and the editor was not ready to receive him yet. He could not help but spin worst case scenarios in his head while he waited for the meeting to start. What if this and that happened to Beckett? What if he was too late to get to her again once she started reporting back to the force? He needed to be equally armed. He was her partner in life, love, and work. He was not going to fail her again. He couldn't fail her again. If anything happened to her now... He whipped out his cellphone and hit the speed dial button.

"Mayor's office." the female secretary's voice came over the line.

"Denise, is he in? Can you squeeze me into his day?"

xoxoxo

Beckett's cop instinct immediately kicked in when she heard the knock on her door. She glanced at the time. She was expecting a few people over that day. But it seemed a bit too early for any of them to be showing up. She walked over to her overnight bag and took the Sig Sauer into her hand. Placing a hand on the doorknob, she suddenly pulled the door open and aimed the gun.

"Beckett! You could have just said "Who's there?" you know!" Lanie reprimanded her.

She lowered the gun upon recognizing her best friend.

"Sorry. Force of habit."

"Keep that habit up and one of these days, you might accidentally discharge that thing on an innocent bystander." Lanie warned in an irked tone. Why couldn't her friend have listened to reason and just moved into Castle's place.

"Do you have it?" she asked once Lanie had gotten settled on the couch.

"It's right here." she handed Beckett a small silver pouch. "Are you absolutely sure this is what you want to do?"

"You said so yourself Lanie, "It doesn't take this long to bake a cake." she opened the pouch and poured the contents into her hand.

"Hmm... hmmm... Glad to see you finally taking a risk on something."

xoxoxo

"Rick, as much as I understand what you are going through, and I know that you have been a tremendous help to the 12th numerous times, your waiver is quite clear. You can't pack and shadow at the same time. The risks are too great. My hands are tied this time." the mayor scanned the waiver that Castle signed 3 years ago. It was still in effect for as long as he was shadowing Beckett. Castle wasn't just about to stop shadowing her. Most specially now that he knew a lot more than she did about The Dragon.

"Can I at least carry a tazer?" he learned from Beckett that certain rules are set into place for the protection of the person. If he could not pack a gun, he was going to pack a tazer instead. That could still cripple any person who tried to do harm to Beckett. As long as he was within range that it.

The mayor looked at Castle. Studying him. 3 years with Kate Beckett had matured the man. This was no longer the playful Castle who had a new woman every month. Was it possible that New York's 9th most eligible bachelor was finally ready to settle down, again that is?

"Let me get legal counsel in here." the mayor picked up the phone and dialed a local number.

xoxoxo

"We come bearing lunch." Alexis offered the bag of food stuff to Beckett who was holding the door open for her and Martha.

"Thanks. I was wondering when you would get here." Beckett locked up after they got in.

"Hi Lanie!" Alexis greeted the woman who was standing on a step ladder, dusting off the book case.

"Hey Alexis, Martha." Lanie coughed a bit as the dust went up her nostrils.

"Is this everything?" Beckett asked as she scanned the contents of the suitcase and overnight bag.

"That and a few things I thought might come in handy." Martha volunteered. "I'm so happy for both of you." her voice cracked a bit, she looked like she was about to cry.

xoxoxo

It was nearing dinner time when Castle finally got back to Beckett's apartment. He did not seem to have a desire to go straight home. Not if Beckett was not going to be there to greet him with her smile and cherry scent that drove his senses wild. He stashed his newly bought tazer in the hall drawer. Beckett would never understand why he bought one and why he would always carry it around when he was with her. He decided to try and explain himself only if and when she finally caught him with it.

She had the makeshift dinner table ready with their meal. Delivered meal that is. She had set the romantic meal setting with a few mood candles and a vodka martini waiting for him when he got in.

"What's going on?" he wondered aloud when she came over to the couch with two drinks in hand.

"What? I can't pamper my man when he comes over?" she sat next to him and took a sip.

She snuggled up to him, instantly feeling him relax the minute their bodies touched. He sighed deeply before draping his arm lazily over her shoulder.

"The food's getting cold." she whispered as she placed her own hand over his draped one.

"Just let me finish this drink." his thought's were obviously preoccupied. Knowing that she would be staying in the apartment alone gave him a sinking feeling. He wished that she would ask him to stay the night.

xoxoxo

"Can you help me do something after we finish our dessert?" Beckett asked as they ate their Red Velvet cake slices. She stood up to get their coffee. Castle registered surprise as he saw his personal coffee mug emerge from the kitchen, in Beckett's hands.

"Sure, what do you need help with?" they were exchanging cake bites.

She stopped. Not really willing to let go of the mood they were in just yet. "Later."

"Is this the coffee mug I use at the penthouse?"

She smiled naughtily at him and just drank her coffee.

xoxoxo

They stood side by side, in front of the accordion window that held the makeshift murder board for Johanna Beckett's murder. Sitting open below it was a filing box. She slowly opened the window and stared at it. Unconsciously reaching for her lover's hand and clutching it as if her life would end if he let her go.

"Why Kate?" he was puzzled. The Kate Beckett that he knew would never box away the most important case of her life.

"It's time Rick." she turned to face him. "I need to move on. I can't let this case kill me. I got lucky once. There may not be a next time. Besides, I have much more to live for now. " she looked at him with sadness and hope mixing in her eyes. He understood what she was driving at anyway.

She slowly began taking down the post it notes and pictures. Carefully packing them into the box.

Castle would normally have been relieved at the actions unfolding before him. But now knowing what he does, he knew that she was no longer safe. Not even after giving up on her mother's case. She had to end it. He had to help her end it, when the right time came.

xoxoxo

Beckett's apartment had only one bathroom and it was located inside the bedroom. He stepped in for some personal business and was greeted by the brand of his toiletries in the medicine cabinet. Even his brand of shampoo and shower gel lined her shelf. What exactly was Kate Beckett up to?

"Castle, grab a sweater from me in the closet will you please." Beckett's muffled voice came through the closed door.

"No problem." he replied as he washed his hands.

Inside the living room Kate was smiling. She was intentionally leading him to clues that she hoped would have him asking her questions when he got back. She had a surprise planned to cap their evening. But it all depended upon how dense Castle was going to be tonight.

He whipped open the first closet door he came to. The clothes hanging inside looked familiar. His clothes! Was she? Was this? He had to know.

He handed her her sweater and sat next to her. Carefully working out what he was going to say before opening his mouth. He did not want to be embarrassed if he was wrong.

"Kate, why do you have my stuff all over the place?"

"Your stuff?" she feigned as she struggled into the sweater while she sat on the couch.

"C'mon luv. My mug, aftershave, shower gel, my clothes?" he urged her.

"What do you think it means?" she obviously held back a smile.

"Kate, I can't assume anything when it comes to you."

She sighed in frustration. Why couldn't he just say it? His guess would probably be right anyway. But she would play along. This was how they did things. They played with each other. Teasing and taunting until one of them finally gave in.

Standing up, she walked over in what seemed like super slow motion to the drawer near the door. Opening it, she took out the silver pouch that Lanie had given her earlier.

"Open it." she told him.

A key attached to a silver chain spilled out of the pouch. He understood what everything was about now. He did not have to be told what the key was for. Looking up at her, he smiled and kissed her softly.

"Thank you. I'll never take it off." he told her.

That was the only time that he noticed that she was wearing two chains around her neck now. She noticed him looking at it. She exposed the chains onto her chest so he could get a better look.

"I wear this for the life I saved." She held up her father's watch. "I wear this for the life I lost." she held her mother's ring up. "And I wear these," she cupped the ring and key to the penthouse that Castle had given her. " for the man who save my life and taught me how to love selflessly." her voice was becoming over come with emotion.

He stared at her in silence for a moment. Not really sure how to react. Not wanting to ruin the moment with a stupid joke. Instead, he did what came naturally to him when he was with her. He pulled her into his side and kissed her deeply. Trying to convey all the love and care that he carried within himself for her in that one moment of bliss.

Out of breath and obviously needing more than just a lingering kiss, he smiled and waited to see what she would want to do next.

She took his hand and led the way. "Let's go to bed."

**The End **

**A/N: This was a fun journey for me. I met a lot of people and got the most number of reviews so far for this story out of all the stories I have ever written. I want to thank everybody who left reviews for me. Each review helped me tweak my work and inspired me every step of the way. **

**To Alex Beckett, BlueTigress, phxgrl, Chrissy, glo1196, castlebeckett siempre,'I'm Widget,Tango Mike Charlie, ToBreatheIsLife, and all the others, I extend my most heartfelt gratitude for always cheering me on and calling me on my mistakes whenever needed. I became a better writer because of all your constructive criticisms. **

**I hope that this story offered you all some enjoyment during this hiatus as well. I can't wait for SEA 4 to finally get started :-) How many more weeks to September 19?**


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